A thread to log the things that are better in the UK than the ones you'd get in Ireland

Even fucking contact lenses are better, maybe because your eyes havenā€™t been fucked up in the first place by some boozed up eye doctor performing laser surgery with his degree from a shitty mick college,
This is getting boring now and heā€™s only playing to the gallery. :confused:

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Sky broadband installers, the boys in Ireland are too busy drinking

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Giant sinkholes swallowing cars.
You wouldnā€™t see a proper sinkhole like that in Mickland.

https://youtu.be/KV-pU4V9SQY

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Broadband installation - the half drunk installers would probably wire it up all wrong before heading back to the pub in mickland. You wouldnā€™t get that on the mainland.

Sorry, forgot to mention - you couldnā€™t make it up.

(Great thread @fran )

Can you not read back two fuckinā€™ posts?

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I felt it didnā€™t quite catch the true sensibility of the original post that inspired it. If this thread is to be a success, it canā€™t just be a throwaway representation, it must deliver the subtlety and nuance we associate with the legend in question.
Oh, and fuck off.

Listen here cuntihooks, @Fran created this thread; he can deliver however much or little subtlety or nuance he so wishes. And I will fuck off. But as an aside, I was fucking off anyway before you told me to.

I believe Fran will be the first to tell you that I have given huge assistance and support in this noble venture.
Where are you fucking off to?

I went for a shit, if you must know.

Televisions.

Specifically, curved televisions that are unreal for sport and would blow your mind.

I must, I must

Batter

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Colonies with loyal subjects.

Organic cod burgers.

Motā€™s.

Weather forecasts. The spud micks havenā€™t a notion

Realistic security exercises

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Civil wars.

Egg trees.