youâd miss @Joe_Player and his cards. @iron_mike deserves the red and a long suspension after that indiscretion.
Verona Murphy in the back of a taxi?
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Weâve dropped to 22nd on the deaths per 100k charts 
Fellas were saying this was a really important metric when we were further up it, so Iâm sure theyâll acknowledge what a good job weâve done since.
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you dirty, dirty manâŚ
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22nd on the ECDC charts?
Ok lads, I have the inside scoop on NPHET. Archbishop Holohan has already decided the the schools will get an extra-long mid-term and the whole country will move to Level 5 for its duration. The government hasnât decided this yet but the Archbishop already has, privately.
The Archbishop knows that he will face intensive questioning from TFK because this undermines his previous advice that there are no transmissions amongst kids in schools, Heâs already getting ready his explanations for this obvious line of questioning.
Archbishop Holohan is going to stick by his claim that there are statistically very few outbreaks in schools. Heâs going to give the example of the kid who got infected because he changed desks as an example of how infections only occur when people donât follow the system. Of course TFK know the reason that there are so few clusters in schools is because the government refuse to test for them. Pure Trump tactics.
The Archbishop is seriously considering giving the line that the transmissions are all occurring straight from kids to parents at the school gate. Because when the kids step outside the magical forcefield of the school then transmissions can occur again.
Now thatâs obviously an absurd explanation but itâs âdoctrinally soundâ within the Catechism of the HSE so heâd be happy to go with it and the Archbishopâs faithful, who now make up the majority of the population, would accept it.
However this explanation poses an extra question: If the transmissions in schools are all happening directly from students to the parents in other families once the students step outside the sanctity of the school gate, why then will kids also be subject to the Stage 5 lockdown during midterm? Why wonât they be allowed to play outside? This contradiction is sufficient to risk causing a crisis of faith for some of the keener minds in the Archbishopâs flock.
This question is still posing the Archbishop some difficult and Ireland is very fortunate that it has some of the greatest theologians on earth to approach this metaphysical conundrum. One solution that the Archbishop is closely considering is to say that kids and students will have to respect the Stage 5 lockdown and not leave their homes because it would be âsocial apartheidâ. In other words, why should children be allowed to play around outside in the autumn air, stamp in the leaves, play with conkers and so on when old people arenât allowed to do the same?
Itâs very important to be respectful of these peopleâs beliefs and Iâm eagerly awaiting the Archbishopâs decision.
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Do I really have to put you on mute?
I put the iron into the mike 
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are you gay now?
wold explain the chocolate fixzation 
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What causes that backlog?
Well I do have 3 sacks
suely it must be near the time when you sit on the throne again rather than changing the bag?
Looking like the end of the month Art. Iâve been on to Armitage Shanks. Theyâre building a heavy duty throne for me cos it wonât be pretty
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Telpis
I think itâs a delay on the result being notified to the HSE but Iâm not 100% sure tbh.
The 65-79s would want to cut out the house parties
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Donât forget the role Mickey Mouse played too.
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Theyâre just milking the coverage they get. If you had after effects of a flu nobody will pay attention to you.
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