Cunts on Bikes

I thought that oul bollix was dead.

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He is alive and kicking and still rolling out the home truths

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The world needs organ donors. But not his eyes. Nobody will want them.

Strava segments. Its the new birdie.

I doubt his liver will be much use either.

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ICE drivers speed up when the light is orange

Was driving into town there earlier. Driving along a two lane road parallel to the river. There’s this guy on a racing bike, full gear hammering his personal best down the middle of the road. I can’t overtake him for a few hundred yards, Hogging the middle of the road. I get past him eventually and then there’s another cyclist in front of me. He’s out a good bit in the road as well but he is more of a civilian cyclist than the other joker. Pass him out and head on to the lights. At the lights the second fella is gesturing to me so I roll down the window. He’s out of breath but he blusters out “you do realise mister that you are supposed to leave a metre of space passing me out”. I said “yeah, I know”. Then he calls me an asshole. So I said in my best Limerick, “fuck off you little cunt” and drove off.

Odd that he was speaking English.

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He wasn’t. I was making it simpler for you.

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You told that story very well. At times I felt like I was there in the car with you.

As I fucked him out of it, I felt like you were there with me.

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So, to clarify, did you call him a cunt in polish in a pikey accent?

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I felt the inclusion of detail about the river was a bit needless. It didn’t really add anything to the story.

My bad bro’

TNH

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That’ll learn him

I was out in the car there earlier and I saw a cyclist with one of these on.

image https://keyassets.timeincuk.net/inspirewp/live/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2015/07/lumos-helmet-1-630x420.jpg

It works so?

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