A new thread for funny incidents you’ve seen or heard about.
On Friday night I got a text from a mate to say that my other mate had set a girl’s hair on fire when leaving a nightclub. He was messing with a lighter at her hair, just to singe it a bit or whatever, on the way out of the club and apparently it went up in flames like firelighters. Well, the two boys freaked out and legged it so my mate is now shitting it as he’s not sure what ensued. Not usually one to stick the boot in (yeah right) but we came up with a few jokes in light of the event. Let’s call my mate John.
What do John and bleach have in common?
They both burn the hair off women.
What did John’s boss say when he got convicted of GBH arising from Friday night’s incident?
You’re fired.
Why did John take up heroin?
Cos he was in jail for GBH.
What’s the difference between John’s hair and the bird’s hair that he set fire to?
Nothing. [John’s a ginger]
Some people pile up crates and tyres for the bonfire on Halloween, John piles up girls.
What’s John’s favourite film?
Who cares, he’s a scumbag fucker who set a girl on fire.
Did you here about the girl on fire that John saved?
Neither did I.