raf flango might need this
Fuck off Gavin.
Has The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini been mentioned on here already. Finished it Friday. Absolutely superb. Definitely in my top ten books of all time.
Has anyone here read The Blind Watchmaker? Reading it at the moment and it’s fairly enjoyable. A tad dated in parts but was surprised to see some of the ‘design’ arguments he refuted are the ones that are still peddled today.
Downloaded it the other day but reading The Selfish Gene at the moment. Looking forward to reading his new one. He’s a hero - thought he was great on The Late Late.
Right, I’m off to cry at Home and Away. See ya later.
Secrets of The Simpsons
by John Ortved
Creators of the animated series and Fox lawyers did everything they could to stop John Ortved’s unauthorized history. The inside story of why he wrote it anyway.
The letter referred to me as Mr. Ortvedmy first sign that I was in deep, deep trouble.
No one calls me Mr. Ortved. Ive been Johnny O, Ortved (at prep school) and even John John. The only time Ive ever been Mr. Ortved is when addressed by the employees of telecommunications companies and lawyers. The letter was, unfortunately, from the latter, specifically the legal representatives of the Fox Corporation, which owns The Simpsons.
I should not have been surprised. I was writing a history of The Simpsons without their consentas I had done the previous year in an article for Vanity Fairfor my book, The Simpsons: An Uncensored, Unauthorized History published this week by Faber and Faber. Hence the letter from Foxs lawyers, none of whom I have ever met, but who I assume hold some very deep pockets and the temperate nature of a Nicaraguan death squad. (The letter itself contained very few specifics, but offered the vague threat of carefully reviewing my book for accuracy.)
One witness to the early days was particularly annoyed that Groening took so much credit for the shows success, when the fat fuck just sat up in his office all day, figuring out ways to make more money [with merchandising] while Sam Simon and the writers churned out brilliant script after brilliant script.
The problem, or delight, in writing an unauthorized history is that someones feathers are bound to get ruffled (by the lawyers reaction to my book about The Simpsonsan entity that has earned upwards of $3 billion for its parent companiesit seemed that I had engaged less in an act of ruffling than total depluming). In the case of my Simpsons history, the squawking started early, only a few months into the project.
Back in 2006, as a 26-year old associate at Vanity Fair, I was delighted to be assigned my first featurethe oral history of The Simpsons, something Id pitched knowing that it would be short, fun, pegged to the release of a major film; a cakewalk for a green reporter. Dead. Fucking. Wrong.
The Simpsons: An Uncensored, Unauthorized History By John Ortved 352 pages. Faber & Faber. $27. Fox wavered, and took their time getting back to me. Months, in fact. So I started interviewing. I spoke to former writers and producers like Conan OBrien, Josh Weinstein and Jay Kogen; and a current one, Tim Long. People were fairly candidI didnt have their cooperation yet, but The Simpsons in Vanity Fairit seemed like a no-brainer. Finally, the word came back from Foxs flaks: no go. There would be no cooperation. Why? James L. Brooks, whose company, Gracie Films, produces the show along with Fox, had heard Id been asking questions about Sam Simon, the shows exiled executive producer, and the kibosh was on.
Now Sam Simon, along with Matt Groening and James L. Brooks, is one of the shows original executive producers. He left the series in the fourth season among much acrimony, kept a big piece of the show, and now spends his untold millions rehabilitating abandoned dogs and donating them to the handicapped. All of this is well known. Why was Brooks going ballistic?
Well, The Simpsons is a brand, a very valuable one at that, and like Coca-Cola, Mickey Mouse, Tom Cruise, or Virgin Airlines, this brands profitability is directly related to its perceived image, an image my book would be challenging (most egregiously, by removing of some of the credit attributed to the series creator, Matt Groening, and giving it to Sam Simon and the writing team he assembled).
It turns out Matt Groening was not considered a great asset by many in The Simpsons writers room; he was not a sitcom writer and didnt really didnt know how to tell those kinds of stories, and Sam Simon let him know it. Once while discussing a script where Marge finally lets her hair down, Matt really wanted to reveal that underneath her beehive, Marge had Rabbit earsSam, of course, said no. One witness to the early days was particularly annoyed that Groening took so much credit for the show’s success, when “the fat fuck just sat up in his office all day, figuring out ways to make more money [with merchandising]” while Sam Simon and the writers churned out brilliant script after brilliant script.
As original Simpsons writer (and the head writer of Frasier), Jay Kogen put it, I keep reading books about Star Trek where [creator] Gene Roddenberry was not the guy who was necessarily at the head of it, or the stuff about The Godfather, where its Coppola and its a bunch of other people. It turns out that what they say about TV and movies being a collaborative effort is really true. Its a large collaboration. But those are hard stories to tell for the press. They like to make stars out of people, so they pick one guy and say, This guys the guy who did it. And thats a pretty good story.
And that was the story James L. Brooks and Fox wanted to stick with. Fox tried to get me to write a different story, How about, one flack told me, you do a history of how The Simpsons Movie came to be, adding that this was something they could get on board with (Entertainment Weekly did this exact story when the movie premieredwith quotes from Brooks, Groening, and the castyou can fall asleep to it here). I declined this very generous offer and continued to work on the story, resulting in some hilarious calls from Fox publicity, with them informing me There is no Simpsons story in Vanity Fair. We said no!
Something I gleaned early from this experience is that Hollywood publicists are so used to journalists kowtowing to their every request that they no longer understand what journalism actually is. Were talking about cartoon characters here, not Watergate, but the light subject matter doesnt exclude the possibility of doing real research and telling interesting stories. They actually thought that we were all on the same team, trying to get their client the maximum exposure, using our words and outlets only to extend their message. Vanity Fair and other magazines are complicit in the lionization of celebrities that has led to this imbalance of power, but the editors at Vanity Fair understand that at the end of the day theyre very much a journalistic entity, and pursue stories accordingly.
The story ran in the August 2007 issue, and by the fall Id signed on with Faber and Faber to expand the material into a book. When word of this got out, Brooks sent a letter to every current Simpsons employee, and all the former ones he thought mattered, asking them not to speak to me. The writers agents sent denial after denial for interview requests and eventually stopped responding altogether. When I asked a mutual acquaintance to put in a query with Ari Emanuel, chief of the Endeavor agency (now WME Entertainment)where many of the Simpsons writers were representedEmanuel told my friend he couldnt even begin to talk about it. James L. Brooks was on the warpath.
At one point in my research for the book, I was poring over court papers, trying to decipher what really happened when Tracey Ullman took Fox to court back in 1991. Ullman and the other executive producers of The Tracey Ullman Show were entitled to part of The Simpsons money, because it had been spun off from their show, and had felt like they were not being properly compensated. It was a complicated trial, and Ullman ultimately lost. I emailed Brooks representative on the case to see if he could explain some of the finer pointsI was coming to Los Angeles later that month, and suggested that if he preferred to talk in person, we could meet over a coffee or lunch. I got back a very formal memorandum, telling me that under no uncertain terms would he discuss James Brooks (still a client) or anything to do with The Simpsons. Furthermore, they knew about the book and would be watching it closely, and so would the lawyers at Fox, copied on the memo. I wrote back, Does this mean you dont want to have lunch with me? That was that.
There was one Doh! in James L. Brooks and the Gracie Films master plan: Many people dont like James L. Brooks. No one gets as successful as Brooks in Hollywood without making enemies, but people carry a special dislike for the man whose power and smart media control has managed to project an image of an avuncular, loveable neurotic for the better part of 50 years. The book I ended up writing quotes more than 75 sourcessome of them Simpsons staffers, former and current, who opened up because they considered his and Matt Groenings attempt to stomp on my project very un-Simpsons.
I have absolutely nothing to complain aboutmy Simpsons reporting turned out better than if Id had Fox and Gracie Films cooperation, and I received an informative lesson in rudimentary investigatory journalism. But the real educational experience was in dealing with major players, the people who are so rich, or famous, or besotted with themselves that they believe they are above the rules of physics, never mind the First Amendment.
It did not occur to the folks at Fox that the risk of not cooperating could be worse for their bosses images than feeding me the story and maintaining some control (and by bosses here I mean Brooks and GroeningRupert Murdoch was forthcoming in our interview and totally helpful). I have to think that they really thought no meant no. And God bless them. I found sources and stories about the series I probably would not have had time or reason to dig up if Id been too busy laughing at their writers and actors charming anecdotes: like the time Matt Groening ate three interns then used their blood to make a devilishly ironic cartoon about mean Republicans and yuppies. (This did not really happenaccording to Fox publicity.)
Cheers for that CLD, interesting read, will look up that book.
Just bought on Amazon. I’ll let you know how it goes…
Good post Cld. It’s an interesting story. Something has to explain how it went from the greatest show in the world to complete and utter shit.
Finished this book.
It is quite good. It’s a pity everyone didn’t get involved.
Sam Simon, Jim Brooks, Tracey Ullman and Matt Groening all stayed away.
Also, ideally there would be some insight from John Swartzwelder. Some of the stories involving him are hilarious.
e.g.
He used to write episodes while sitting in a booth at a coffee shop “drinking copious amounts of coffee and smoking endless cigarettes”. When California passed an anti-smoking law, Swartzwelder bought the diner booth and installed it in his house, allowing him to continue his process in peace
Legend.
The style of the book is a series of quotes from people. Which works quite well but it takes a little while to get used to.
Here is my other favourite story about Swartzwelder:
From one of the other writers [Brent Forrester]:
We would have story meetings with him outside. And I remember distinctly one time being a young comedy writer and John Swartzwelder just happened to be sitting there, smoking a cigarette on the lawn. And I thought, man, I’m just gonna ask John Swartzwelder a random question and see what he says in return. And I said “John, what would you do if you had all the money you could spend?” and without a moment’s hesitation he said “I would buy a battleship and the Empire State Building. With the Empire State Building I would just let it run down and get decrepit. Because people would say ‘You can’t do that! That’s the Empire State building’ I would say, ‘No, I can! I own the Empire State Building’… The Battleship, I think it would change people’s conversations with me if they knew that I had a battleship”
Decent thread this.
Over the bar is a great book alright. The author comes from good stock.
On my travels, what books do ya recommend. Ive always like sports biographies though would hardly stomach Cody. Mickey Harte’s book would probably suit me better. Interesting club battle he had which I wouldnt mind reading more on.
Any of ye read any Vince Lombardi stuff? The best soccer book I read by miles is Only a Game by the Dunph, superb read. Tony Cascarino’s book is a good laugh too, McGrath’s one for obvious reasons. Got the Nicky English one when I was younger and liked it.
Loved history in school. Any of ye recommend any Irish history ones? David Neligans book is bound to be good. A very interesting character. Ed Moloney’s book Secret History of the IRA I used to read on the Tube in London. Good effort but without downgrading its importance the Northern Ireland peace process is a very boring topic after a while.
Have read a lot of business biographies. An interesting one my parents got me was Ivor Kenny’s Leaders a couple of years ago. Must check it up when I get back cos I reckon a lot of those ‘leaders’ will be bust at that stage.
Dont tend to like fiction and cannot read any book with pidgin English such as Trainspotting.
Trainspotting is an absolute classic you mong.
Bought 6 books last night which may have been a little over the top in retrospect.
Got myself:
- Arthur Miller’s new short story collection (I know he’s dead but it’s a new release in Europe anyway)
- Colum McCann - Let the Great World Spin (not sure about it but supposed to be very good)
- John Steinbeck - East of Eden (classic)
- Sports Illustrated - Best Writing 1945 - 2005 (looks good)
- Matt Cooper - Who Really Runs Ireland (recommended by Larry Duff)
- Philip Roth’s new book whatever it’s called
[quote=“Rocko”]Trainspotting is an absolute classic you mong.
Bought 6 books last night which may have been a little over the top in retrospect.
Got myself:
- Arthur Miller’s new short story collection (I know he’s dead but it’s a new release in Europe anyway)
- Colum McCann - Let the Great World Spin (not sure about it but supposed to be very good)
- John Steinbeck - East of Eden (classic)
- Sports Illustrated - Best Writing 1945 - 2005 (looks good)
- Matt Cooper - Who Really Runs Ireland (recommended by Larry Duff)
- Philip Roth’s new book whatever it’s called[/quote]
Everyone is entitled to their opinion you tard.
Love the film Trainspotting but I just cant read that pidgin tard english. One of Mark Twain’s books is written the same way.
[quote=“KIB man”]Everyone is entitled to their opinion you tard.
Love the film Trainspotting but I just cant read that pidgin tard english. One of Mark Twain’s books is written the same way.[/quote]
:rolleyes:
It’s called Phonetics you heathen, and i’m not one bit surprised you cant read it.
[quote=“KIB man”]Everyone is entitled to their opinion you tard.
Love the film Trainspotting but I just cant read that pidgin tard english. One of Mark Twain’s books is written the same way.[/quote]
I love when idiots defend themselves by saying they’re entitled to their opinion. Of course you are mong, run along now and play with your opinions you dick.
It’s called Phonetics you heathen, and i’m not one bit surprised you cant read it.[/quote]
:D:clap: Did you get that johnny jump up problem fixed in the end?
Rock is seething again. Must have been out late last night putting out fires in a gypsy camp.
By the rule of thumb here, the first person to mention seething/rattled, etc etc, is usually the person seething/rattled. This has been proven following extensive research in a Tipperary facility.
I couldnt give a fuck 
That’s your problem you see. Maybe you should.