are you on a diet?
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Had to leave room for the family punnet of blackberries and the cookie that Madame made
What’s in the top right hand corner there above the sausages, mate?
They look like carrots, it’s getting a bit ridiculous now.
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Good man. Not a fucking bean in sight 
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Those induction hobs are a bastard, mate. Had one in my last gaff, half the pots and pans and woks etc I had didn’t work on them.
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I find it excellent. All my pots are stainless steel and my pans are all cast iron.
As a matter of interest, are your pans non-stick? Tefal?
I had a Tefal wok yes and a little tiny frying pan for frying eggs in and neither of them would work. Nor my coffee percolator.
Your induction hob did you a favour. Have you seen Dark Waters? PFOA (perfluorooctanoic acid) is pure poison.
No, mate. Any good?
Yeah man. It’s very good.
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Are you serving rhubarb sauce with the lamb? Lads are going to all kinds of extremes now to appear edgy.
Stewed rhubarb and custard for pudding.
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I hear you brother. It turning itself off if the buttons get splashed is a pure cunt of a feature.
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Roasted corn, beer and flour tortillas. Kiwi salsa. Guacamole. Red cabbage with orange and apple cider vinegar. Prawns. Margaritas.
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I like your tablecloth.