The Official TFK Farming Thread - Rural Lives Matter


#602

The brothers could give me as many rushes as I can handle,dockens I have enough of.


#603

Farming in a bog and complaining it’s too dry you couldn’t make it up :sweat_smile:


#604

There’s no bog in north mid mid west limerick


#605

There’s a Celtic Rap album cover to be made out of that. Straight Outta Shanagolden.


#606

We’re in bother lads. Time for the Government to sort this out.


#607

Our neighbour has a boithrin type lane up to their house with a stretch of grass on the side of the lane opposite to us. Went out the other morning and seen this big fucking beast of a bull staring at me from the patch of grass. If he decided there would be very little to stop him making a charge. He didn’t just escape and wander in there, he’s been there a couple of days now. There’s just a token bit of wire about waist height keeping him in. Doesn’t look like it’s electric although I’m not sure how I can tell. To summarise, are there such things as placid bulls cos this fucker is not well fenced in and could easily wander out on to the main road?
Yours etc
Uselss townie cunt in the sticks.


#608

No such thing as a placid bull. They can sense fear too. The only thing i would say is they generally only attack once a year and that sates them. Just hope its one of the other neighbours I guess :man_shrugging:


#609

That’s no joke, if it decided to have a go there’s a fair chance it’ll destroy you. Are you sure it’s a bull?


#610

Pretty sure. It’s fucking huge, ring on it’s nose, no udder but has other “equipment”. The only reason I’m doubting it is one is because of where it is.


#611

That’s a Guard Bull to keep townies away.


#612

Feed him a few carrots,that’ll keep him quiet.Or a few sweets,bulls love hard candy.


#613

You need to talk to the farmer, he may as well be leaving a loaded shotgun lying around. Lanes and neighbours are a curse, one wrong word and a generational feud is born.
He sounds like a right useless bollox.


#614

Remember if a bull is chasing you to run in zig zags, play dead and make yourself as big as possible.


#615

Bulls hate water so run towards water if you see any


#616

If there’s no water around just piss yourself


#617

Matador training. That’s the boyo


#618

Thanks for all the advice but like any townie faced with a rural dilemna I will probably just stand still and shit myself.


#619

Right, here’s the best way out of it.
Anonymously phone the cops. Tell them you witnessed a bull chasing two kids along the main road. Be fairly specific about the location.
It’s a miserable, cowardly way out, so you might want to get the missus to do it.


#620

Grab it and you’ll find out.

Generally, bulls are placid enough when on their own. Its when they are with their harem that they are really dangerous. If you were to read case descriptions of bull attacks, usually they happen when the farmer is trying to separate the bull from the cows i.e at milking time etc.
Having said that you can never be 100% as it is a living breathing tonne of attitude behind the nose ring so always best beware.


#621

Better to give the bull a wee squeeze. Just to be sure