Paddy rings the ispca and tells them he found a suitcase on the side of the road full of puppies.
āAre they movingā asks the woman, āI donāt knowā says Paddy ābut that would explain the suitcaseā
13 Likes
That is good , not at all terrible
Thatās a great gag, 
Lovely!
While weāre on the livestock theme:
Whatās the difference between a feather and a chicken?
A feather is kinky - a chicken is perverted
1 Like
Q: What sort of music do wind turbines like?
A: Theyāre big metal fans.
1 Like
What did the cell say to his sister when she stepped on his foot?
Mitosis!
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Put it into the oven until its bill withers
2 Likes
I thought of a classic this evening after killing an ant.
What did the Pink Panther say when he killed a load of ants?
Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant
Actually that one might not work in text 
I had my leg X-rayed today.
The doctor said: āYour patella measures 2.54cmā.
I said: āInch high knees?ā
He said: āęØēé«éŖØęÆ2.54åē±³é«
4 Likes
Thereās these two goldfish in a tank. One says to the other, ādo you know how to drive this thing?ā
5 Likes
That is quality.
1 Like
I wanted to watch the world origami championships last week.
but it was only on paper view
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My parents used to own a paper shop, but it blew away.
It probably would have been enveloped by the bigger chains anyway
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints.
2 Likes
my Korean friend died the other day
so yung
3 Likes