The Townie

Horrible people these. Lie somewhere between the culchie and the scumbag incorporating the worst elements of both.

I want a list like the bogger thread.

An English Premier League soccer jersey is considered a fashion statement

If you drive through a town you are bound to see at least one bird under the age of 18 up the ballyjames.

She lives probably with her mum in a council estate in the town.

One pack of Johnny Blues also in the back pocket.

Tracksuits (the J Lo kind) don’t have back pockets.

The fags are more likely to be held.

Don’t forget the big hoop earings and the “MAM” ring

Sovereign rings also MGG.

full track suits and tight hair with a fringe glued to their forehead with gel…and a chain hanging out over their celtic jersey…

Mind Reader

That’s exactly how I envisage North County Cranky

for the real hardcore townie it would be a lonsdale tracksuit

Baseball Hat at an almost impossible angle to head.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/graphics/2007/02/25/srfron250207.jpg

if you get stuck into them early on in a soccer/hurling/football game they will crumble and start fighting with themselves.

Very good at doing flicks, and keepy-ups etc with a soccer ball, but when it came to matches were useless.

Why do they chose the chippers to hang around outside?..always struck me as odd.

Whiter than White runners.
Cream Jeans.
Hoodie.

The ability to say “D’ya want Hash” out of corner of mouth all in one go, whilst looking around all the time keeping “sketch” for “Pigs”

The ability to knock back litre cartons of milk in one go without spillage before kicking empty carton around street.

actually had a run in with a scummer in limerick a few weeks ago…he was about 16 decked out in his full tracksuit and i was outside the cockoo box on denmark street at about 3.30 am of a saturday morning with another lad trying to convince 3 women to come back to a house party…i was giving them my best “garda puke” lines…when on came the little punk:

Scummer: give us a fag there love…
quaire 1: no i only have a few left…
scummer: all i want is one…
Garda Puke: look lad she says she doesn’t want to give you a fag, rev up and fuck off (also had my chest stuck out to look extra tough and intimidating)
scummer: who are you, do you know who i am…

i stared him out of it with an intimidating look…next thing he made a grab for the fag in the quaire 1’s hand, knocking it to the ground…he took off running but i turned and caught him with a stringeresque ankle tap (except i used my boot instead of a hand)

he took some hopper…and i got the three women back to the house party…

thats not working Boo Boo
What is it anyway?

Picture of yer man in the Celtic jersey holding the “no to foreign games” sign.

Assaulting a child is never funny Puke. You should have been sent to Limerick Prison for that. Only 2 of the above apply so far for this Wexford town native - Celtic jersey and hoodie. We didn’t hang out outside the chipper as yoofs. We hung out over in the factories. So there.

Too fuckin true, especially the likes of the Vols or Sars, whiney Wexford townies.