The Unnamed RTÉ JournalistThread

1

After a magnificent league campaign from Mr Peavoy on rte.ie where he entertained us all with error-strewn reports of Sunday afternoon sport I think it’s time this lad had a thread of his own.

It’s hard to believe that this guy gets paid for his writing skills, are there really no better journalists out there? He can’t string two sentences together and doesn’t seem to have the first clue about sport.

He has a high profile world cup column on rte.ie where his first job was an interview with BBC’s African Football Correspondent.

I particularly like the following two questions:

  1. This is a belter of a question, real investigative journalism and a cracking use of our license fee:

What is the problem with the park and ride services exactly?

  1. This is just magnificent succinct writing in terms of the “raised to the ground” aspect in particular:
    [i]
    In terms of the attitude towards the World Cup in South Africa, there has been a lot of media reports that Soccer City, Johannnesburg, was built in slum areas and that those slum areas were raised to the ground and the inhabitants moved on. How much truth is there to those reports?

Also, in terms of the ticket problems, what is the current attitude towards the World Cup from the people of South Africa?[/i]

2

I presume this is still Peavoy doing the live updates on rte.ie

http://www.rte.ie/sport/worldcup/2010/0614/worldcup_livetext_mon_14june.html

Some highlights today:

I’ll be tuned to the action on RTÉ 2. If your not, shame on you. But the competition is open to all commentators from all broadcasters. Drop us a line if you spot a candidate for the award on another channel. Bill O’Herlihy is joined in the RTÉ studio by Graeme Souness and Liam Brady. Let’s hope none of the lads let themselves down.

Bob Carpenter reckons ‘Italy will be knocked out of group without scoring a goal showing us all just how bad they are. Holland will win world cup mainly because of Van Persie and Van der Vaart, 2 class acts.’ Fear your going to be proved wrong on both counts, Bob.

12 min Bendtner is showing well for the ball in the early stages, but the Danes are playing chase up to know as the Dutch pass the ball around to good effect.

In fact the whole page is littered with either innane comments, grammatical errors or just plain uninteresting nonsense.

3

That’s poor. What an idiot.

4

I’ve never read this thread before because I assumed Peavoy was some esteemed dead author of whom I knew nothing.

This guy is indeed a turnip.

5

Spelling ‘now’ incorrectly is unforgiveable. What a moron.

6

like WTB, hadnt a clue who this muppet was. this is some classy reporting here.

58 mins Camoranesi enters the fray for Italy. Marchisio makes way.

6 other inane comments…

72 mins There’s 12 South Americans on the pitch at the moment, but it’s all legit. Camoranesi was born and bred in Argentina before answering Italy’s call.

7

This simpleton is reporting on Meat (sic) - Laois this evening. Here’s his offering so far:

7.17pm Joe Sheridan cuts in on goal from the flank, however, he loses the ball in front of goal.

7.16pm Laois lose possession to Harrington, Sheridan is fed possession for Meath - his shot at a point hits the post. This is followed by a wide for Laois’ Kevin Meaney.

7.15pm Meath build again. Kenny fires in towards the Laois goal, but is is scrambled clear. Free-out to Laois.

7.14pm O’Loughlin plays in Quiqley and 20 metres out from goal O’Loughlin recevies the ball again. He plays in Healy on the edge of the area - Healy handpasses over the bar. Meath 1-02 Laois 0-03

7.13pm The free is 23 metres out from goal. Tierney hits hit sweetly and over the bar. Meath 1-02 Laois 0-02

7.12pm Free for Laois, Kingston was fouled on the ball.

7.10pm Laois have plenty of the ball, but are giving it away needlessly.

7.08pm Reilly and O’Rourke knock over two points in quick sucession. Meath have turned this one on its head. Meath 1-02 Laois 0-01

7.07pm Cian Ward cuts inside his markre on the right flank and cuts in on goal, he squares for Joe Sheridan and Sheridan unmarked at the far post taps-in. Meath 1-00 Laois 0-01

7.06pm Stephen Bray almost gets a away for Meat, but is dispossesed as he bears in on goal.

7.05pm Healy tries to double the lead for Laois, but he slips it slightly wide of the post from a tight angle.

7.01pm, We’re off. Darren Strong gets the firs point of the day. Fine point from 30 yards out. Meath 0-00 Laois 0-01

7pm It’s National Anthem time in Tullamore, action to get underway shortly.

Fucking hell.

8

7.25pm Plenty of breaking ball and neither side is taking hold of the game. Tierney is space, 25 metres out from goal, he laces it and it’s good and over the bar. Meath 1-03 Laois 0-04

9

Maybe its a spoof of some kind?

Mawn Meat!!! Give it dem Leash fookers!

10

7.26pm Munnelly hits the psot. The ball falls for Kingston. He is at a very tight angle from goal and goes for it, but it’s another wide! Six wides now.

11

7.44pm The half-time whiste blows. Meath carry a five-point lead into the second half. Back shortly for more action.

I can’t wait, Tadhg. I just can’t wait.

12

7.57pm Second half on the way team. The teams are just emerging back on to the pitch at O’Connor Park.

13

Is he drunk today? He’s usually terribly inarticulate and bad at spelling but he’s all over the place today.

7.59pm Brian Meade hitsa wide for Meath. That’s the third wide for Meath. Laois had seven wides in the first half.

7.57pm So, can Laois, stop widing so often and shut down the Meath forward line? They are the key questions ahead in the next 35 minutes of Championship action.

14

He’s talking about the ‘25-yard area’ now. This chap is a prized simpleton. I’ve rarely seen anything like this on a website of repute.

15

8.01pm Graham Reilly intercepts the kick-out and points from 20 yards. Moments later, Reilly has a chance for a hat-trick, but he takes his point instead of going for the net. Meath 2-07 Laois 0-06

This is the stuff I love. It’s impossible to tell whether Reilly got that point and Peavoy got the goalscorers wrong or whether he got his names mixed up and Sheridan just got a point.

16

Anyone remember those Ann and Barry books when you were learning to read in primary school? Ann is going to the shop. Barry is also going to the shop. Ann and Barry like going to the shop… and so on. This cunt writes like this - Brian Meade hits a wide. That’s three wides for Meath. Laois have had seven wides. Laois will have to stop ‘widing’. Fucking retard.

17

There’s a young lad who writes for one of the Galway papers who writes exactly like that. ‘Galway will face Offaly. Offaly will be a tough test. Galway will want to win it. The game will be good’. How does anyone come to write like that, nevermind get paid for it.

Also, having listened to Keith Barr at half time I get the impression he enjoyed the same media training as Tadgh.

18

8.26pm Shane O’Rourke beats Healy to a long ball into the Laois half. Rourke feeds Healy who jinks inside the area. Meath 2-13 Laois 0-10

Cahir Healy is really taking the piss here, what with scoring an own point according to Tadhg. It looked more like Cian Ward knocking that one over to me though.

19

This guy seems a bit on the retarded side alright.
8.24pm Nine minutes left to play. Seamus Kenny is down injured and the magic sponge is making an appearance!

On a slightly related matter, the polls on the RTÉ Sport website are always fairly ridiculous. Usually they have big long sentences as their answer options. Unfortunately I can’t find a poll history to get some examples of what I’m on about. The one that’s up there at the moment is ridiculous for a different reason. The question is ‘Are you happy with the standard of refereeing so far in this year’s GAA Championships?’ and one of the options is ‘No opinion’. By viewing the poll results, I see that 86 people have voted that they have no opinion. Wouldn’t you just not vote if you didn’t have an opinion. Voting on Internet polls is not compulsory!

20

Can we get a Rory Houston thread please, Rocko?

Tadhg must be doing the World Cup or something today but I like Rory’s efforts this afternoon - here’s a highlight:

1731 Cork get a second goal, I didn’t see it as I was concentrating on Offaly’s late score. Limerick have been excellent today. Cork 2-18 Limerick 0-12

Apparently Shane Murphy got sent off in the Cork-Limerick game too.

None of the major incidents are described. Sentences are like ‘A goal for Offaly’. Nothing about build up, where it was struck from, what type of strike it was, keeper’s effort to save it or anything.

These minute by minute reports are fucking embarrassing. I can’t believe that’s the best the national broadcaster can muster up.