Like a Ryanair flight — always arrives early because they set a skewed time. Officially 10k was the figure so we are still well below that .
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Charles spent all day with a certain 5 time Olympian 2 Sunday’s ago, a fellow royal who tested positive last week. It used be gout these boys gave each other!
Access to tests I reckon
Balls I just put a meme in the meme tread saying the same thing. Beat me too it
Under promise, over deliver
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Jodie is a lovely sort
Now we’ve stopped testing to stop numbers rising 
You’d want to be some cunt to do this to anyone, no less a Govt Minister working around the clock for his country.
Animals.
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Some nurse after doing 3 night shifts was out for a walk and surrounded by a gang of feral youths in Clontarf who were all coughing on top of her. Did the same to an elderly couple out for a walk near her.
We havent stopped testing. They are actually trying to increase the numbers who test positive.
94% negative is a serious waste of resources and tests.
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They’ve told us that a lot of people with it wont have a fever - yet to get a test you have to have a fever + another symptom… Some ham, like @Juhniallio, will now just go about his day infecting half the country because of this mixed messaging from Leo and Simon.
Just polished off a chicken fillet wrap there and it was gooo-ooood.
Peak illness on the mainland predicted currently to be may 
Nowhere near yet
That would be disastrous for Italy and Spain.
150 new cases in Wales today — English figures to come. 11 UK deaths so far. They are breaking figures up by principality to make it look better.
There’ll be no one left to infect by then.
Falling over themselves patting each other on the back in Westminister this morning
This could be the big one.