Fao Jugs

1

http://www.independent.ie/lifestyle/relationships/love-advice/the-ten-best-seduction-techniques-1610596.html

Did ye ever read such shite in your life? :wink:

2

"It may be superficial, but women tend to judge a man on the first place he takes them. "

This explains alot. While studenting in Limerick I brought a girl out for a drink and then “food”. She was not impressed either by the decor of Donkey Fords nor by the smell of my Fiesta which was, 4 hours earlier, the home of about 500 mackeral, and now was providing us with a slightly musty, sticky air’d eating emporium.
The windows got all fogged up from the hot food so no doubt passers by who could not see in the foggy windows but could hear me say “Crikey, when you pull the skin off the meat is roasting”, were horrified.
Of course, if they stuck araound they might even have heard her say “I’m never eating that again”.

Ah, the old days of GSH.

Yours in memories,
GSH.

3

[quote=“Gaillimharais”]http://www.independent.ie/lifestyle/relationships/love-advice/the-ten-best-seduction-techniques-1610596.html

Did ye ever read such shite in your life? :D[/quote]

#11. If you do somehow end up in some fat whale’s gaff, make sure you don’t shit all over her bathroom floor.

4

[quote=“Garda Sean Horgan”]"It may be superficial, but women tend to judge a man on the first place he takes them. "

This explains alot. While studenting in Limerick I brought a girl out for a drink and then “food”. She was not impressed either by the decor of Donkey Fords nor by the smell of my Fiesta which was, 4 hours earlier, the home of about 500 mackeral, and now was providing us with a slightly musty, sticky air’d eating emporium.
The windows got all fogged up from the hot food so no doubt passers by who could not see in the foggy windows but could hear me say “Crikey, when you pull the skin off the meat is roasting”, were horrified.
Of course, if they stuck araound they might even have heard her say “I’m never eating that again”.

Ah, the old days of GSH.

Yours in memories,
GSH.[/quote]

Any bird that isn’t impressed with Donkey Fords isn’t worth having.

5

Too right.
Even if they were not impressed by location or the decor I woudl have though that after 2 battered sausages and a few bites of fish that they would be nodding their head in agreement with my choice of fine dining.
Instead, they displayed scowl after scowl as the lard slowly started to harden on their lips.
Lardy lips ! God the memories.

Yours in getting a hankering for a cod portion,
GSH.

6

the only reason to bring a doll to Donkeys early on is to test her out.
any young wan who is happy to wolf down a cod and chip will most likely be the type to let herself go at a later date.

this is a little tip im happy to share

7

[quote=“Garda Sean Horgan”]Too right.
Even if they were not impressed by location or the decor I woudl have though that after 2 battered sausages and a few bites of fish that they would be nodding their head in agreement with my choice of fine dining.
Instead, the only woudl produec scowl after scowl as the lard slowly started to harden on their lips.
Lardy lips ! God the memories.

Yours in getting a hankering for a cod portion,
GSH.[/quote]

Every Sunday evening after arriving back into the kip we inhabited in Castletroy would head into town to collect a bounty from Donkeys.

You wouldn’t want her getting too fond of it either though.

8

"Women, meanwhile, can move faster, as men are less afraid of being treated as sex objects. "

Who knew !!??
Wow, remember, you read it first on the Indo.

Yours etc,
GSH.

9

These are my priceless tips which I’ve gleaned from women over the years…

  1. Never use Lynx, it’s unimaginative apparently.
  2. ABC - Always Be Cleanshaven.
  3. Cat-hairs on your neck, get rid of them.
  4. Ease off on pints when out with a classy bird.
  5. If you are a twat, mask this fact for as long as possible.
  6. Always show an indifference towards football in the early days.
  7. Chapped lips shouldn’t be manfully ignored, treat with lip balm.
  8. Shower at least every two weeks.
  9. Resist the temptation to wear that PSV Eindhoven scarf, wear a ‘nice’ one instead.
  10. When matters move to chess openings, always defend the merits of the Dutch Attack over the more flamboyant Latvian Gambit.

I hope these tips will prove successful for forumites when out in the wild.

10

[quote=“SHANNONSIDER**”]These are my priceless tips which I’ve gleaned from women over the years…

  1. Never use Lynx, it’s unimaginative apparently.
  2. ABC - Always Be Cleanshaven.
  3. Cat-hairs on your neck, get rid of them.
  4. Ease off on pints when out with a classy bird.
  5. If you are a twat, mask this fact for as long as possible.
  6. Always show an indifference towards football in the early days.
  7. Chapped lips shouldn’t be manfully ignored, treat with lip balm.
  8. Shower at least every two weeks.
  9. Resist the temptation to wear that PSV Eindhoven scarf, wear a ‘nice’ one instead.
  10. When matters move to chess openings, always defend the merits of the Dutch Attack over the more flamboyant Latvian Gambit.

I hope these tips will prove successful for forumites when out in the wild.[/quote]

Alot of common sense there :D, took me a long time to learn No.4!

Lads is donkey’s still going? i thought it was closed…

11

[quote=“Gaillimharais”]http://www.independent.ie/lifestyle/relationships/love-advice/the-ten-best-seduction-techniques-1610596.html

Did ye ever read such shite in your life? :D[/quote]

Indeed. I’ve been trying that shite for years and it got me nowhere. I think the only way forward is to turn into a leering sleazy drunken pervert and see how that works out.

12

[quote=“SHANNONSIDER**”]These are my priceless tips which I’ve gleaned from women over the years…

  1. Never use Lynx, it’s unimaginative apparently.
  2. ABC - Always Be Cleanshaven.
  3. Cat-hairs on your neck, get rid of them.
  4. Ease off on pints when out with a classy bird.
  5. If you are a twat, mask this fact for as long as possible.
  6. Always show an indifference towards football in the early days.
  7. Chapped lips shouldn’t be manfully ignored, treat with lip balm.
  8. Shower at least every two weeks.
  9. Resist the temptation to wear that PSV Eindhoven scarf, wear a ‘nice’ one instead.
  10. When matters move to chess openings, always defend the merits of the Dutch Attack over the more flamboyant Latvian Gambit.

I hope these tips will prove successful for forumites when out in the wild.[/quote]

The cleanshaven tip is a difficult one. Some women lull you into thinking that they like the “rugged look” but when it comes down to the business end of the season they’re never going to be happy with the beard rash problem that it creates.

I can’t fault any of the rest of these tips. Numbers 1, 3 & 9 are particularly important.

13

The humble scarf should not be underestimated in the game of seduction, Fran.

14

Yeah, if you’re seducing funboys…

15

I defer to your superior knowledge of funboys, Jugs.

16

Deoderant

What types are acceptable, SS*?

I must admit to never having properly bonded with any type.

I’ve tried loads of different brands, roll-on, spray-on and I’m still searching for the special one.

17

Scarves are their biggest turn-on. I’ve refused to wear one since the anal invasion of '99.

18

A man about town like you would probably want Grey Flannel or Intuition, Bandage.

19

[quote=“ChocolateMice”]
Lads is donkey’s still going? i thought it was closed…[/quote]

Still going strong, although I think they had a small fire a few months ago

20

scarfs are gay on men end of