Under no circumstances would I wear shorts to a funeral
No, not related at all but I reckon I know him since he was about 4.
Shorts are grand once youâre wearing black socks
Hypothetical Iâd like to call the âUncle Ned paradoxâ .
Your parent dies. Your Uncle Ned didnât go to the funeral. His reasoning is paper thin. No acceptable excuse given.
Many years later Uncle Ned dies.
Do you go to his funeral?
- No, fuck him. Disrespectful prick. Hope he died roaring.
- Yes, because if I donât go Iâm just as bad as him.
0 voters
I think both sides have merit. Iâd like to know the forum take on it.
who are you trying to insult? his wife/kids (if they exist) or him? if its the uncle, i have some bad news for you
People are awful weird about funerals sometimes and I suppose death itself. Iâve gone to plenty of removals/funerals for folks I wouldnât have had a lot of time or respect for, just to show support for family/friends of the deceased.
Whats your connection with the rest of the family. When you think about it you only go to a funeral for the people you know not the people who are dead
Go to the funeral,take your place in the queue and when the time comes look their nearest in the eye and shake their hand.
In this life, you stand your ground or you donât.
Was âUncle Nedâ a sibling of the parent that died? Or brother in law? Or married to sister in law?
or father
If the funeral is the only incident Iâd give benefit of doubt and close it off by going âŚbut if there was trouble all the way along then Iâd nearly respect the fact he didnât like my family by staying away on his final JourneyâŚ
None of the fathers people went to my mothers mothers funeral in 1976. No reason, no falling out, the fathers people and herself remained friendly and theyâd call in and all that when they were down here. But it burned my mother for the rest of her life. She never said it to the father, because he thought the world of his family but very occasionally she said it to us and how hurt she was.
Her brothers went to the fathers mothers funeral.
Be the bigger man. Let it not be said etc etc.
Some people are very immature around their obligations in this regard. Thatâs my experience of it anyway.
For family, thatâs out as far as cousins, uncles aunts etc Iâd always go. That thing that you might think ah shure they wonât notice if Iâm not there, my motherâs experience always knocked that out of me.
Iâve to tip over home today to bring the aul lad to another of his good palâs funerals.
My mother rang me to say heâs very upset about it. No matter how old they are theyâre still your friend and youâll miss them and the divilment you shared together
You live long enough youâre there to see all your friends die
I still remember it well from my grandfatherâs funeral back in 99. The bossman (as we called him) was 77 when he died, but seemed very old back then (my auld lad will be 79 this year!). It was a fucking massive funeral. We had people coming into funeral home from 5:15 up until nearly 10pm. I could barely stand at end. He was a great character and got a good send off.
Anyway, there was an auld pal of his, Billy, a right character. A bachelor he would have played cards with a few nights a week. Billy came up to my grandmother and he started bawling his eyes out. Nobody expected it. Aside from my uncle singing The Westâs Awake in the church, itâs the thing I remember most vividly from that funeral almost quarter a century later.
Anyway, hope yer auld lad is doing ok.
I saw similar at my fatherâs wake. A great friend of his, with each other through thick and thin, was in the house. A very jolly character usually and would be messing around a bit in conversations and cracking jokes with others in the house. Then came the time to pay the last respects before the lid went on. I spotted him in floods of tears exiting the sitting room.
That is very natural. Have seen it done and done it myself.
The best thing you could do.