GAA Mavericks

Sport
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Cringe

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Yes I did. Having read many of your efforts of times past I realised that I’d be better off scratching my balls or just staring into space for a few minutes. I promise not to be angry about the milliseconds that those 5 words cost me though.

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Deary me :laughing:

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:grinning:

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Galway hurling heroes reflect on All-Ireland success

by Iggy Conneely
“Sports Column”, page 91, Galway Freesheet, September 7th, 2017

Well, what a week it’s been for Galway hurling. The Liam McCarthy cup has returned to the west after a gap of 29 years following a memorable final success against Waterford, and the celebrations have been in full swing ever since the final whistle at Croke Park on Sunday.

The Freesheet caught up with two of Galway’s heroes, talismanic forward Joe Canning and the no nonsense, straight talking Johnny Irishman, who has returned from New York this summer to play a key peripheral role in the team’s All-Ireland success.

Iggy: Lads, tell us all about the celebrations:

Joe: It’s still sinking in, I suppose. But, yeah, there was a just a real feeling of satisfaction and contentment. To see the joy on the faces on the Galway supporters was amazing.

It’s been an amazing year, really. There’s been a great atmosphere in the camp all through. Everybody has pulled together so well. There’s just a real feeling of camaraderie between us all, there’s a great bond between everybody. Micheal Donoghue, the management team and all the support staff have been brilliant. Everybody has played their part, every single person involved in this has played a vital role. The panel members who didn’t make the 26 on Sunday are all responsible for this as much as anybody – we couldn’t have done it without them.

Johnny: I fuckin’ dhrank 15 fuckin’ pintsh and shlept in me own fuckin’ puke. Then I got up the nexsht mornin’, had breakfisht, and dhrank another eight pintsh. Everything elshe is fuckin’ bullshit.

Iggy: What did you have for breakfast, Johnny?

Johnny: A big fry up an’ 'a ball ‘a me own fuckin’ shnot.

Iggy: The atmosphere must have been amazing when you brought the cup home?

Joe: Yeah, it was. As you probably saw on the television, Michael Donoghue’s father Miko was waiting for us to arrive in Ballinasloe, and it was a lovely, poignant moment to see Micheal to be able to bring the McCarthy cup back to him. It epitomised what the GAA is really all about – family and community.

There were huge crowds in Ballinasloe and then of course when we got back to Galway, to see the crowds that turned up in Pearse Stadium, especially to see the joy on the faces of the kids, it was amazing. We’re just so pleased to have won it for everybody because the people of Galway have been waiting such a long time for success, and we’re just glad we were able to bring it to them this year. The supporters have always stuck with the team and they’re the best in Ireland.

Johnny: I shpent the bus journey fuckin’ pukin’ up in the fuckin’ jacksh. It was fuckin’ claassh. Then I kicked the cup around the fuckin’ car park, roarin’ and shoutin’. That’s why you play hurlin’, like, to do shtuff like that.

Iggy: Tell us about the match itself, lads.

Joe: I suppose it was all about bringing controlled aggression. We knew we’d have to put in a massive performance for the full 70 minutes. But we knew we had to keep out heads all through. It was very important to get a good start and we did that. But Waterford were never going to lie down, they’re too good a team to do that, and they came right back at us, as we knew they would. The lads responded very well to the goals. At half-time there was a very positive attitude in the dressing room. We knew we were playing well. But at the same time we were only a point up, so we knew we’d have to put in the performance of our lives in the second half to win it. When Waterford went a point up, we knew we had to dig in and redouble our efforts, keep bringing that controlled aggression but to be calm and stick to the process, and thankfully it worked out.

I suppose maybe in the end what won it for us was that bit of experience of All-Ireland finals that maybe some of the Waterford players didn’t have. We had to lose two to win one. But that’s how difficult it is to win an All-Ireland. I think that experience stood to us a lot.

Johnny: We jusht shaid to go out and fuckin’ kill the cunts. Get the fuckin’ ball and leather it as far as posshible. Then I’d catch it and fuckin’ bursht everyone outta the way. If they want to wreshtle, I’d shaid I’d wreshtle. If they wanted to box the head off of me, I shaid I’d boxh the head off of them. If they wanted to puck the head off of me with a hurl, I’d puck the head off of them with a hurl. Give the cunts plenty of it, like. Look it, they want to fuckin’ kill you, so you have to fuckin’ kill them firsht.

Look it, sure Johnny Irishman ishn’t goin’ ta shcore ten points but I’ll fuckin’ work me hole off and make sure none of their lads do either. Everything elshe is a hape 'a shite.

But, happy enough to have won it, like.

Iggy: Waterford were difficult opponents for you…

Joe: Yeah, they’re a great team and they made it hugely difficult for us as we knew they would. They never gave up and we had to be at our best for the 70 minutes. They’re a young, up and coming team, they’re only going to get better. We have a great respect for them and we know they’ll be back. I don’t think it’ll be too long before they win the All-Ireland themselves and if Galway can’t can’t win it in future years, it’d be nice to see them do it. We know that while we had been waiting 29 years for an All-Ireland they’ve been waiting 58 years so we know that they must be feeling a huge amount of hurt. They were tremendously gracious in defeat which is the mark of true sportsmen. Derek McGrath is doing a great job with them and they have so many great players. They’ll be back, there’s no doubt about that.

Johnny: That’s fuckin’ bullshit. Fuck the fuckin’ Wexford cunts. They’re only ‘a shower of cunts, eshpecially that fuckin’ shlaphead bollox McGrath. Fuck everyone elshe. Where the fuck is Wexford, anyway?

Iggy: The very sad death of Galway legend Tony Keady was uppermost in everybody’s thoughts in the run up to this final. Was there a feeling amoongst the team that you wanted to win it to honour his memory?

Joe: Yeah, I suppose we didn’t want want to say it explicitly but there’s no doubt it was very much a factor in everybody’s mind even if nobody wanted to say it outright that we had to win for him. I suppose it wasn’t so much that we felt that we had to win it for him, as at the end of the day it’s only sport, but we really wanted to do justice to his memory putting in the best very performance we possibly could, and if that was good enough to win, well that’s all we could have asked for. And, touch wood, it worked out. But now that we’ve won it, there’s no doubt that we’re just glad that we might hopefully have given Tony’s family some solace and strength at a terribly difficult time for them. Of course the reality is that no All-Ireland can bring Tony back and we’re very mindful of that. But we’re glad to have done justice to his memory and it was great to have the Keady family on the pitch afterwards to share in the moment. They have a long road ahead of them in dealing with this tragedy, and they will always be welcome around this squad. We’re just happy that hopefully we’ve given them something to smile about at such a sad time. There was a real feeling that Tony was up there looking down and smiling on us somehow, as there also was with Niall Donohue, who played for us in the 2012 finals and who we still miss and think about a lot. So, yes, we’re glad to have justice to the memory of both with our performance.

Johnny: I’d shay his wife got the ride at the banquet, he he. Fair fuckin’ play to her. She’s a fine lookin’ woman for her age. I’d have no fuckin’ problem throwin’ a length into her and ridin’ the hole off of her. I’d say she’d hand it back to ya shoft, like.

Iggy: What are the plans now for the rest of the week?

Joe: Well, we’re really looking forward to bringing the McCarthy cup around the county now because this victory is for the people of Galway and we want as many people to be able to share in it as possible. We’ll be heading to David Burke’s home place in Peterswell tonight and then to Gort and Loughrea and Portumna over the coming days. Then of course over the coming weeks and months we’ll be visiting all the schools which is one of the great things when a county wins an All-Ireland. We’d like as many people as possible to feel part of this, as that’s what the GAA is all about.

Johnny: (pukes slightly) I haven’t a fuckin’ clue what’s happenin’ tonight, never mind tomorrow. We’re only shtartin the dhrinkin’, like. Burkey, where’sh me fuckin’ pint? I probably look like a big fuckin’ shlob now, but I don’t fuckin’ care.

Iggy: Will you be heading back to New York, Johnny?

Johnny: I will in me fuckin’ hole. Ah, shure look it, I probably will, but shure tish’ only a couple of hoursh on a plane, like, tish’ not like I’m goin’ to fuckin’ Timbuk-fuckin-tu. I’ll go back when I go back. But shure I’ll only be shtartin’ the dhrinkin’ when I get back there. I’ll have some fuckin’ hangover in January. But I’ll fuckin’ worry about that when fuckin’ January comes, like.

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Cringe^n

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Whoever wrote that needs to be shot immediately

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Some failed journalist no doubt.

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Some of the stuff written in it is scandalous

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If the admins had an ounce of decency they would ban the cunt who posted it, but they don’t and they won’t. Sad day for the site.

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Great to see the pompous hurling snowflakes so offended. :clap: :clap: :clap:

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good lord Sid…

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Embarrassing.

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You’re an utter fucking scumbag @Sidney

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That is fucking scandalous

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CC @glasagusban , look at what your little Pal wrote there!

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I’ve given that a “like”.

Nice of a Galway man to consider me to be of the same calibre as Sylvie Linnane, at least.

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:rofl::joy:

Best one yet

You are an excellent satirist , top class

May I suggest that TFK members crowd fund you so some of your best work can be collated and published?

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:hushed:

Very un KP like I must say…