Job Interviews

anon61878697 · February 12, 2019, 9:39pm

But they’re my lucky ones

TreatyStones · February 12, 2019, 9:46pm

If its in Cork just make sure you mention how great Cork is early on, it’ll be plain sailing after that.

fistoffury · February 12, 2019, 9:47pm

Probably worth mentioning corkness too.

Big_Dan_Campbell · February 12, 2019, 9:57pm

Use words like accountability and solution provider. They eat that shit up!

farmerinthecity · February 12, 2019, 10:28pm

@The_Dublin_Bay_Prawn

ciarancareyshurlingarmy · February 12, 2019, 11:10pm

I see one of the Limerick posters advised that you bring a copy of your cv, the job spec and a notepad to the interview. Spread them out and have them accessible. Use the notepad to jot down multi-layered questions.

He would be out the door in less than 5 minutes if he did that with me.

flattythehurdler · February 12, 2019, 11:12pm

Just tell them you know where they live

anon78624367 · February 12, 2019, 11:22pm

Ask them if they like their tv where it is!

PhattPike · February 12, 2019, 11:23pm

You’ll need an angle for each interviewer. A tri-angle, if you will.

Batigol · February 13, 2019, 9:24am

The local councillor should be good at picking apart your trigonometry knowledge alright

It’s public service, so just have a good example, real or made up, that shows how you’ve displayed each one of the competencies in your previous employment. Fill it up with buzz words and jargon.

Copper_pipe · February 13, 2019, 9:25am

Make sure you tell them you’re good at making tea

Fagan_ODowd · February 13, 2019, 9:29am

KIB_man:

have a rake of anecdotes learned off in your head -

here is one I have used many times, other ones in relation to hard work- spent my summers as a student working in construction - learned the value of a good work ethic

Q - when have you been able to personally resolve an issue with a customer etc etc (there has always been a question of this type thrown in)

A - I like to tell a story of back when I was a student - i used work during all the holiday seasons for spending money, ah sure ya know yourself bit of money for the rest of the year hahaha. Anyway one Xmas, I got a job with Dunnes and was on my way into my shift when on the corridoor on the way in I saw this person in serious distress at the phone credit machine. it was one of those machines that you put your money in and it dispensed the credit slip. anyway he was creating quite a scene as it was the main hallway into the shopping centre at our busiest time of year. I kind of felt I had to go up to him and see what the matter was. Eventually after some persuasion I got him to calm down and sit on the bench next to the machine. he explained that he had put 50 euros into the machine and nothing had come out. He really needed that fifty euros. Anyway I signalled to another staff member to get him a cup of tea and got our head office to ring the machin distributor crowd. We put him on the phone to them and they ensured him that they would have someone there today and if there was fifty euros jammed in the machine it would be returned to him. he seemed happy enough with that and headed away. The manager on duty at the time commended me for my action and i actually received the employee of the month award. I guess the key was seperating the person from the problem. People are decent at the end of the day and we all can get a bit stressed from time to time.

I dropped this story in London a few years back to silence for a few seconds. I thought I was fucked - anyway the snot nosed cunt at the other end of the table goes yeah I used work in Retail myself we used see these kinds of incidents regularly. they lapped it up :lol:

Interviews are a pile of bollocks that justify ridiculous salaries from the most disposable part of any organisation - HR. I liked my one here in Aus - a coffee with two of the senior lads and they asked me when i could start after about five minutes. No bullshitting around.

balbec · February 13, 2019, 9:33am

And taking sick days

Julio_Geordio · February 13, 2019, 9:43am

Have a few questions lined up.

Are ye strict on starting times?
What’s the holiday allowance?
Do I get Christmas holidays or are they from my allowance?
Do you offer flexi time?
Will I get overtime/flextime if I sit on my desk at a computer and wait for the traffic to ease up?
How long is lunch?
Is there a tea break in the morning?
Do I need a doctors cert if I’m sick?
How many paid sick days do I get?
What’s your long term illness policy?
What’s your work place injury cover like?
Is there a Union I can join.

Stuff like that

Copper_pipe · February 13, 2019, 9:45am

Are gambling sites banned on the office network?

Julio_Geordio · February 13, 2019, 9:47am

Do you monitor internet usage?

ciarancareyshurlingarmy · February 13, 2019, 9:50am

I cant get over lads thinking about working for a business which they know nothing about.

You would not join a sports club or voluntary association without doing groundwork and talking to someone who has already been there.

Big_Dan_Campbell · February 13, 2019, 9:52am

@anon61878697

just copy these responses and use them

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXGbf5EdYVM

Copper_pipe · February 13, 2019, 9:56am

Almost like shifting some young wan after only meeting her about an hour before hand. You don’t know anything about her but at the time it doesn’t really matter.

anon78624367 · February 13, 2019, 10:00am

would you prefer to ask young wans a few questions before lobbing the gob?

What’s your policy on fingering? Do you have a preference on foreplay technique/time?

No wonder you’re a virgin