Lift Etiquette

Things
1

All over the place this morning.

I arrive on the ground floor and press the up arrow for the lift, in order to travel to the third floor. The lift comes down from the third floor (indicated by a downward arrow) and stops at the ground floor. Three people get out and one remains.

‘I’m going down’ says her.

I look at the button I pressed beside the lift and the light had disappeared. I look at the display above the lift and the arrow was pointing up.

‘I think it’s going up’ says I.

‘No I pressed the button’ says her.

I pressed the button again beside the lift to see if maybe the other one would open and all this aggro could be saved but it was forcing me into the original one.

‘It’s definitely going up’ I repeat.

‘Is it? It must be actually, my floor isn’t lit up here’

Turns out she never pressed the button at all.

People.

2

Fixed that for you

3

Was she hot?

4

Thought this going to be about someone farting and stinking out the lift or something along those lines.

Anyway your one was a dozy twat, probably from marketing or human resources.

5

I’m excellent in lifts. Rarely make a mistake and I’d certainly never make one like that. Always amazed by the idiocy of people who get in a lift and are surprised by the direction it’s travelling in. “Ah I thought it was going down” and that sort of comment. Fucking retards.

6

I am going to sit on the fence here and say absolutely not, under any circumstances.

7

[quote=“Rocko, post: 474523”]
I’m excellent in lifts. Rarely make a mistake and I’d certainly never make one like that. [/quote]

You put that on your CV didn’t you?

8

I also think lifts should not stop on the first or second floors unless it is for disabled people. The amount of lazy fuckers that will wait 5 minutes for a lift rather than take a minute to walk up or down a flight of stairs is unreal. lazy fat fucks.

9

I haven’t been in many lifts and wouldn’t have a clue what to do, that would be my sort of reaction. There aren’t many lifts in West Limerick…

10

Very true. I was lucky not to get fired from a previous job over an ill-tempered encountered I had with the HR Director over a lift.

11

What happened?

12

Ah tis too long to go into in detail, but basically he unpacked a lift I had been filling with boxes to take up the top floor so that he could put a few scummy graduates into it to take them to the first floor.

13

Big Four yeah?

14

Were the graduates paraplegics? Had ye words?

15

I’d tentatively agree on limited stops too. A one floor commute should be absolutely prohibited under all circumstances.

Two floors with baggage may be permitted.

I’d love a lift in my workplace where the floor would open up and you’d plunge to your death if you made a mistake. It’s not that tricky but it is a good indicator of who’s got cop on and who doesn’t.

16

Ya. Muppets.

I said something about the cost of the equipment he was after putting back out into the rain, he said: “Well we are investing 500,000 in these Graduates”
I replied: “500,000 and they can’t climb a flight of stairs? You got done”

17

Maybe she meant going down in a different sense. Slut.

18

Nobody really listens to those HR dopes anyway Runt. If your good at your job the Directors will snigger at the idiot. Good comeback.

Were the grads standing there watching him unload as well?

19

Colm Gorman is a forum member.

20

That tax floor is like something out of Jurassic park alright.Its little wonder they keep them down in the basement.They are not for public consumption.