You forgot Emerson with the buckets of gel in his hair
Tier 2 Boro legend. You have to be either a celebrity or a Tier 1 Boro legend to make the cut for this fictional Up For The Match.
European Cup final pairings which have never happened:
Liverpool v Manchester United
Liverpool v Barcelona
Barcelona v Real Madrid
Real Madrid v Bayern Munich (have played each other in 17 semi-finals)
Real Madrid v Manchester United
Barcelona v Bayern Munich
Liverpool v Bayern Munich
Liverpool v Ajax (how close we came)
AC Milan v Manchester United
Liverpool v Inter Milan
Juventus v Manchester United
AC Milan v Bayern Munich
Juventus v Bayern Munich
Real Madrid v Ajax
Barcelona v Ajax
Manchester United v Ajax
Ajax v Bayern Munich
AC Milan v Inter Milan
Juventus v Inter Milan
European Cup Final Pairings which have never happened but PROBABLY WILL happen in the future:
Liverpool v Aston Villa
Liverpool v Borussia Dortmund
Liverpool v PSG
Real Madrid v Real Sociedad
Real Madrid v Real Betis
Real Madrid v Villarreal
Bayern Munich v Tottenham Hotspur
Bayern Munich v Monaco
Bayern Munich v Bayer Leverkusen
Barcelona v PSG
Barcelona v Chelsea
Barcelona v Genoa
POWER RANKINGS of Irish international rugby players in the jersey numbers 11-15 since the year 2000:
1 Brian O’Driscoll
2 Denis Hickie
3 Shane Horgan
4 Gordon D’Arcy
5 Robert Kearney
6 Bundee Aki
7 Hugo Keenan
8 James Lowe
9 Garry Ringrose
10 Geordan Murphy
11 Robert Henshaw
12 Luke Fitzgerald
13 Keith Earls
14 Tommy Bowe
15 Kevin Crash Ball Maggs
16 Andrew Trimble
17 Mack Hansen
18 Girvan Dempsey
19 Rob Henderson
20Andrew Conway
21 Jacob Stockdale
22 Simon Zebo
23 Jordan Larmour
24 Jack Crowley
25 Stuart McCloskey
26 Jared Payne
27 Chris Farrell
28 Mike Mullins
29Jamie Osborne
30 Gavin Duffy
31 Fergus McFadden
32 Tyrone Howe
33 Darren Cave
34 John Kelly
35 Justin Bishop
36 Craig Gilroy
37 Jimmy O’Brien
38 Conor O’Shea
39 Brian Carney
40 Paddy Wallace
41 Ian Dowling
42 Luke Marshall
43 Rory Scannell
44 Calvin Nash
45 Robert Balacoune
46 Tom Farrell
47 Denis Hurley
48 Anthony Horgan
49 Michael Lowry
50 Shane Daly
51 James Hume
52 Felix Jones
53 Tiernan O’Halloran
54 Will Addison
55 Johne Murphy (0 caps)
56 Dave Kearney
Why is the nomenclature used for road/fun running “5k” or “10k” while the track equivalent is 5000 metres? Is it to differentiate between the two codes?
Is the World Record for 5k a separate achievement from the 5000 metres record?
1 Like
Yes. 2 separate records for indoor and outdoor 5km too
1 Like
VAR nicknames for teams
LiVARpool
EVARton
VARchester United
ManchestVAR United
VARsenal
WolVARhampton Wanderers
Blackburn RoVARs
ChVARlton Athletic
VARcelona
VARis St. Germain
Olympique de VARseille
Bayer LeVARkusen
PSVAR Eindhoven
JuVARtus
SVARta Prague
Red SVAR Belgrade
VVVAR Venlo
AndVARlecht
VARt of Midlothian
St. VARtrick’s Athletic
RiVAR Plate
Power ranking of Ireland international goals
Uh oh
Rogue return key pressed
Here we go
1 Ray Houghton v England 12/6/88
2 Ray Houghton v Italy 18/6/94
3 Robbie Keane v Germany 5/6/02
4 Jason McAteer v Holland 1/9/01
5 Alan McLoughlin v Norn Iron 17/11/93
6 Troy Parrott Goal 3 v Hungary 16/11/25 (subject to possible rising in the rankings)
7 Robbie Brady v Italy 22/6/16
8 Ronnie Whelan v USSR 15/6/88
9 Paul McGrath v Hungary 4/6/89
10 Kevin Sheedy v England 11/6/90
11 Niall Quinn v Holland 21/6/90
12 Tony Cascarino v Norn Iron 11/10/89
13 James McClean v Wales 9/10/17
14 Robbie Keane v Spain 16/6/02
15 Tony Cascarino v England 14/11/90
16 Niall Quinn v England 27/3/91
17 Robbie Keane v France 18/11/09
18 Shane Long v Germany 8/10/15
19 Mark Kennedy v Yugoslavia 1/9/99
20 Jason McAteer v Holland 2/9/00
21 Matt Holland v Cameroon 1/6/02
22 Troy Parrott Goal 2 v Hungary 16/11/25
23 Liam Brady v Belgium 10/9/86
24 Matt Holland Portugal 7/10/00
25 Ray Houghton v Norn Iron 11/10/89
26 Tony Cascarino v Albania 26/5/93
27 Paul McGrath v Bulgaria 14/10/87
28 Tony Cascarino v Hungary 4/6/89
29 Gary Breen v Saudi Arabia 11/6/02
30 Mark Lawrenson v Scotland 18/2/87
31 Troy Parrott Goal 2 v Portugal 13/11/25
32 Robbie Keane v Yugoslavia 1/9/99
33 Robbie Keane v Iran 10/11/01
34 Robbie Keane v Italy 1/4/09
35 John O’Shea v Germany 14/10/14
36 Kevin Kilbane v Czechoslovakia 11/10/06
37 Frank Stapleton v Belgium 10/9/86
38 Kevin Moran v Bulgaria 14/10/87
39 John Aldridge v Mexico 24/6/94
40 David Kelly v England 15/2/95
41 Robbie Brady v Bosnia 13/11/15
42 Wes Hoolahan v Sweden 13/6/16
43 Robbie Keane v Holland 2/9/00
44 Liam Brady v Brazil 23/5/87
45 Niall Quinn v Denmark 28/4/93
46 Niall Quinn v Norn Iron 31/3/93
47 Jonathan Walters Goal 2 v Bosnia 16/11/15
48 Michel OG v Spain 26/4/89
49 Michael Robinson v Holland 9/9/81
50 John Sheridan v Spain 13/10/93
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It’s an Easter egg for breakfast kind of day.
4 Likes
An incomplete list of annoying alternative spellings or pronunciations used by media:
Slobodan Milosevic
Slob-uh-Dan (as pronounced by nornal people) / Sluh-boddan (as pronounced by absolute freaks who did exist)
Epstein
Ep-steen / Ep-stine
Osama Bin Laben / Usama Bin Laden (as used by Ceefax)
Taliban / Taleban (as used by Ceefax)
Al Qaeda
Al Kye-eeda / Al Kye-da / Al Kay-da
Gadaffi / Gadafy / Khadafi / Qadafi / Qhadafi
UEFA
You-ay-fa (always the Irish standard) / You-eee-fa (The Brits in the 1980s and early 1990s loved this pronunciation) / You-fa (Scottish radio pronunciation)
POWER RANKINGS of famous missed penalties not involving Ireland in penalty shoot outs:
1 Roberto Baggio Italy v Brazil 1994
2 John Terry Chelsea V Manchester United 2008
3 Diego Maradona Argentina v Yugoslavia 1990
4 David Beckham England v Portugal 2004
5 Andrea Pirlo AC Milan v Liverpool 2005
6 Bastian Schweinsteiger Bayern Munich v Chelsea 2012
7 Marco Van Basten Holland v Denmark 1992
8 Socrates Brazil v France 1986
9 Franco Baresi Italy v Brazil 1994
10 Andriy Shevchenko AC Milan v Liverpool 2005
11 Sergio Ramos Real Madrid v Bayern Munich 2012
12 Jaap Stam Holland v Italy 2000
13 Luigi Di Biagio Italy v France 1998
14 Michel Platini France v Brazil 1986
15 Roberto Donadoni Italy v Argentina 1990
16 Gareth Southgate England v Germany 1996
17 Liam Brady Arsenal v Valencia 1980
18 Stuart Pearce England v West Germany 1990
19 Bukayo Saka England v Italy 2021
20 Virgil Van Dijk Holland v Argentina 2022
21 Chris Waddle England v West Germany 1990
22 Frank De Boer Holland v Italy 2000
23 Kylian Mbappe France v Switzerland 2021
24 Yann Kermorgant Leicester v Cardiff 2010 (Cardiff gained revenge for losing a rugby penalty shoot out to Leicester in 2009)
25 Cristiano Ronaldo Real Madrid v Bayern Munich 2012
26 Lionel Messi Argentina v Chile 2016
27 Chris Waddle Sheffield Wednesday v Wolves 1995
28 Michael Gray Sunderland v Charlton 1998
29 David Batty England v Argentina 2006
30 Steven Gerrard England v Portugal 2006
2 Likes
Surely the Shevchenko missed penalty places above the Pirlo one purely because it’s always shown as the clinching moment in old footage of the 2005 final. I’d never even realised that Maradona missed a penalty v Yugoslavia until now, the Gareth Southgate missed penalty v the German’s in 1996 would rank above it. It’s shown every time England play Germany.
The Maradona miss is ICONIC. It was a terrible penalty and it looked all set up to be a grand humiliation. But Argentina still won that shoot out and Maradona would have grand penalty redemption in the semi-final, before the final ended up as a grand let down.
I prefer Pirlo’s miss to Shevchenko’s because Pirlo had a greater aura as a player and because Dudek psyched the fuck out of him, as well coming about four yards off his line and getting away with it.
Ronaldo’s miss in the 2008 Champions League final shootout deserves a mention. The preening cunt could hardly celebrate the win because he fucked up his own penalty
Maxime Bossis miss v West Germany with the Jimmy Magee commentary in 1982 ranks above all of those particularly in the context that the German keeper saving it should not have been on the field to do so.
And next up Horst Hrubesch the man they call The Monster.
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A list of ESTABLISHED European international teams which have TWICE FAILED to qualify for a World Cup in the USA:
Denmark
Poland
Hungary
Wales
Northern Ireland
Finland
Iceland
The Serbs and the Slovaks and the Ukrainians never got a go at playing a World Cup in the USA.
The Serbs would have got a go in 1994 and might have won the damn thing if they hadn’t started a genocidal war which destroyed their country and ended their national football team forever.
The Slovaks narrowly missed out as part of the RCS for 1994.
Ukraine got independence too late to be in the 1994 World Cup qualifying draw.
Everybody else of note in Europe got a go at a World Cup in America.
Gheorghe Hagi and Hristo Stoichkov