The Official TFK Father's Issues Thread. I don't know how they do it

Still be proper order. Lesson learnt.

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Now, folks today’s motto, regardless of what you have heard previously, is that violence solves everything.

•Be assertive. Tell the person bullying you to stop in a calm and clear voice.
•Laugh it off. You might not find bullying funny but if the person bullying doesn’t think it’s affecting you then they might quit bullying you.
•Let an adult know. Tell a parent or teacher what’s happening so they can make sure it doesn’t happen again or give you some advice.
•Don’t fight back. You may get more hurt if you engage with bullies. Remember, a lot of the time bullying isn’t about you – people who bully are often unhappy at school or home.

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Standing up to a bully more often than not means getting a good fucking hiding. The bully has selected his victim mainly because he believes he will win the fight if it comes to it. He is a pretty shit bully if he is selecting victims that are able to batter him!

Secondly this notion that if a kid stands up to a bully and gets a hiding it sends a message to the rest of the class that said kid is not to be messed with, is nonsense. All it does is send a message that “this kid is an easy target so fill your boots you bullying cunts”. Advice from @Little_Lord_Fauntleroy above is the way to go. The rest of this stuff works in the movies but not in real life.

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There was a lot of macho advice given here earlier on today, most of which seemed to involve the young lad becoming some sort of killing machine overnight, most young lads will never be able to land a punch on the nose of the bully no matter what daddy says, it really is Hollywood stuff to think this can happen overnight. And this bullshit that talking to teachers or coaches is a cowards way out WTF, he’s already told his da.

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My advice was spot on.

Adopt a MLK Gandhi approach.

Make love. Not war.

Awful as it sounds, you won’t change the bully, but you might change his target.

Posters such as @Little_Lord_Fauntleroy should qualify their posts by saying that they don’t have son’s so their advice may be flawed

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It’s a tough situation. I was in a similar situation myself when moving from Junior cert into 5th year. There was this real asshole who drove around with a cricket bat and used to give all the kids a few lashes of the bat. He really disliked me because he chased me home one time but I made it into the house and my mom pulled a gun on him. Anyway he caught up with me one night and was about to give me a serious hiding but I had set a trap for him and my friends were hiding up on the roof and poured a tin of paint all over him. Everybody from school was there and they all laughed at him. Really softened his cough for him.

It doesn’t always work out that well but it is an option to consider.

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Congrats by the way @Locke delighted for you.

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Lead balloon.

Lovely

Don’t know about that, remember going toe to toe with a bully I’d had enough of in 5th/6th class. I didn’t kick his ass or anything but he didn’t attempt anymore bullying after that and if anything softened somewhat.

I remember the same fella showing me burn marks on his hands which were due to his father burning him with cigarettes. He was laughing and joking about it and the gravity of it all went completely over my head at the time. As bullies go he wasn’t the worst but his upbringing had him seriously fucked up. I’d be surprised if he wasn’t locked up at this stage

I’m sure it works in some cases but I know very well that most young lads who are the victims of bullying just don’t have it in them to punch somebody in the face and being ‘told’ to do so by the macho old fella will cause further anguish. Each case is different and we know little enough about the case to be doling our advice, I just can’t believe that people would have the team coaches etc left in the dark.

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I won’t be listening to patenting advice from lads who couldn’t produce a son.
My kids will be encouraged to protect what’s theirs and to fight their own battles.

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We really softened that cunts cough, bro. :ok_hand::ok_hand:

569023A0-3EFD-4CC5-946F-9C591995875F

Shut up you ape.

If this bully keeps pushing buttons, he will catch 5 across the eyes.

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Parenting

Violence is the very final option for me but if I’ve learnt anything over the years it’s that you don’t have to lash out physically to be feared or regarded as a bit of a psycho not to be trifled with.

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One son diagnosed borderline dyspraxia and other son diagnosed with dys graphia (new one to me) this week.

Decided not to tell them as the label gives them a get out card to play. Only real effects handwriting and with second lad transcribing from a board.

I could never hold a pen properly - these days everything seems medicalised and labeled.

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