The Official TFK Father's Issues Thread. I don't know how they do it

opening topic

the terrible twos

any advice much appreciated- so far im seeing glimpses of anger but ive heard some scare stories

It’ll all work out in the end mate don’t worry. They are only finding their personality. These are the glory years of parenting. The real slog is when you have teenagers.

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I have no experience in rearing children but I have house trained a few dogs which in essence is the same thing and the best way to do it is through fear…If the child pisses or shits on the floor the best thing to do is to rub their face in it and give them a few slaps to let them you know business, then throw them outside for a while

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Proof positive that child abuse is rife amongst muldoond and the gga


I am much more than a GAA man, Bridge Celtic are my first love

My father never replies to a text. Is there anything I can do to teach him to do this? He has also taken to wearing what can only be described as a Russian tank driver’s style cap with ear flaps etc. Is there any way I can wean him off this thing so that he wears something less ridiculous when going about his daily business?

Hmm shocking tendency towardss child abuse referred to above. Shove their face in their own shit indeed.

i can see that - loving it at the moment

Ah yes Tase. Enjoy the moment.

The best time mate, don’t waste a minute of it.

TASE, the best way to deal with the terrible two’s is to ignore them, especially in public and deny all knowledge of the child. Eventually they go away and come back when they’re hungry.

The problem I have at the moment is a 7 year old who thinks Mesut Ozil is the best player in the world and has therefore decided to support Real Madrid. How do I deal with this appalling vista?

Been through the terribles twos only once, which despite having three kids is not a bad ratio. I’m not sure if I’m being sexist, but the terrible one was the girl (in the middle). The 2 boys were fine. Just to make sure she covered the 2 year age window, she started it at 21 months and finished it at 2 yrs 3 months. Sleep deprivation was a nightly occurence and I honestly thought once or twice about having her exorcised. No joke.

However we came through it, and she’s now the best daughter a man (or woman) could ask for. Much better than her 2 lazy good for nothing brothers anyway.

Great thread mate, it’s a good 6 years since I dealt with the terrible twos. All I remember is we could go nowhere public tried a few times to eat out while he was at this stage(big mistake), I’m facing into a double dose of the terrible twos soon but luckily the recession has put pay to us doing anything in public so they shouldn’t be such an issue this time. :smiley:

I have three youngsters at home,a girl(7) and two boys aged 3 and 18 months,its tough oul going when theyre small,my best advice is dont let the little fuckers best you under any circumstances,if they act the bolix pull them up on it,if they hit you hit em back a little bit harder,if you put em to bed and they scream for an Hour let em scream the penny will drop sometime and they’ll drift off to sleep,get em to bed early in the nights,get em to pick up after themselves,get em to have manners from an early age.

All this being mean will stand them in good stead in the Years to come id reckon,our 7 Year old is a good girl most of the time,you could bring her out in public without her making a show of you,that took a bit of work,it didnt just happen by itself.Treat em mean and only be nice to them when theyre being good,they’’ thank you for it at some stage.

Been through and out the other side with the twins, can’t say it was all that bad. Not there yet with the youngest. Its grand though, a few showdown moments but if you can get through to the child that one of the parents is the bad cop when required that usually stops them in their tracks.

What you need to do is smear the phone in piss and rub his face in it, then throw him outside for an hour. Bring him back in and text him again. He won’t be long texting you back.


What do you mean by being “mean”? I’m not a father, thus far from an expert, but i have a friend who is a child psychologist and things like that can affect them for life according to her.

Discipline i agree with, being a cunt to them though is a different thing.

Thinly veiled “I like to drive home from the Spots locked and hit the child a few digs” post from Link.

Ah no I wouldnt be into hitting the poor divils but they’d get a good crack every now and again if they put in for it,take no notice of these child psychologist arseholes one look at that David Coleman pewt on RTE would tell you that.Id often notice kiddies in shopping centres and even at Birthday parties and stuff completely running amok,its usually the fault of mammy and daddy letting them do what ever the fuck they like from the day they were born,that wont be happening in my house,my young uns are happy and havent a care in the world,they’re also well mannered when i bring them anywhere,its possible for that to happen,ya dont need to let em do whatever they like for them to happy.