The Official TFK Father's Issues Thread


Amazon mate. You don’t even have to leave your chair


You’ve come a long way pal


its a fucking nightmare


It was touch and go over the last few days and picking up a few cheap “nice posts” for saying “he’s a boy” and “I drove back from the hospital on my own” didn’t stop it from gnawing away at me. But I’ve the “great reply” in my arse pocket now and that’s all that matters.


Onlt the 8th one handed out — @Fran still leads the way with 65 likes for Haggis Mcjockstrap quip


It’s all been worthwhile now mate :clap:


I’m considering a vasectomy reversal to have a go for it


I’m delighted to announce that my stunning Venezuelan girlfriend has, prior to making my breakfast, given birth to three strapping handsome baby boys. I’ve informed her that they shall be christened Henry Che, Joy Tone and Theobald Emmet Wolfe.
I’m very pleased to say that her magnificent figure and proud bearing has more than retained that rarefied quality which drew me to her in the first place. And the boys are doing well and eating rare rib-eye steaks as we speak.
In expectation of Ireland being freed imminently I’ve given the beautiful creature the morning off.


Great news. Delighted for you all. Let us know when they change from being beautiful baby boys to whingy shoulder-chipped Nordies.


It’s a real mixed pot here. You’ve fantastic fathers like @backinatracksuit off camping and hiking with the kids in Kerry, and making memories that they’ll all cherish forever. Then you’ve the likes of @gilgamboa who’s more of an “open that back door and let the little fucker tire himself out in the garden so I can skull a few cans of Bulmers in peace and see if Perpignan win the first half race to 30 against Bayonne in the Top Quatorze” kind of guy. I’m just trying to keep it nice and steady at the start of my fatherhood experience. I can strive for adventures and bonding in due course.


We heard you the first time @Bandage . And you’ve really started to milk the shit out of this a bit too much. I’m withdrawing all my likes from your posts for the time being.


A shocking post on such an auspicious occasion


It’s certainly time for the bile to recommence but, as far as I’m aware, my great reply stands and can’t be rescinded. So put that in your vending machine and smoke it, you bollox.


you mean suspicious occasion


I liked this post then rescinded it to show I mean business.


This is no time for cynicism.


Its all about balance mate. Dont let anyone sucker you in and tell you its all good


Would you not give your poor wife a break? Add a new kid to the mix and there’ll be no mirrors left on the car


now @Bandage is the time that you really find out who this woman is also, do not concede an inch, ever.
you’re not married here and have no rights BTW if she fucks off in the morning- you’ll be lucky id say at this stage if your surname is even on the litlle fuckers birthcert, she knows this as well by the way and will use this as a bargaining tool in any argument
By 6-8 months the shit will really really hit the fan- you’ll come in after a days work and she’ll have been at home all day going spare with the child and she’ll hate your guts

itl be time for a creche … oh and guess what - yeah - itll be out of your salary
and if this is inner city dublin thats 1k a month


Precarious to raise a child as a tenant in an apartment as well. House hunting on the horizon too.