For fuck sake…
Two deviants.
1/10
To be fair it is the terrible jokes thread
Do you know what the side effect of Viagra is?
Your wife’s headaches come back.
“You know that beautiful girl at work I wanted to ask out?” a guy asks his friend.
“You mean the girl who gives you an erection every time you see her?” the friend replies.
“Yeah, that’s the one. I finally worked up the courage to ask her out, and she agreed.”
“That’s great!” says the friend. “So what’s the problem?”
“I went to meet her last night, but I was worried I’d get an erection again. So I got some duct tape and taped my penis to my leg. That way, if I got an erection it wouldn’t show.”
“Sensible,” the friend says. “Then what happened?”
“So I get to her house and ring the doorbell. She answers wearing the sexiest dress you ever saw.”
“And then what happened?”
“I kicked her in the face.”
A Cavan man took a girl back home in a taxi.
She was so pretty that he could hardly take his eyes off the meter.
What do you call an Italian junkie?
Giovanni Change.
Fixed
My grandfather could speak to ghosts, who would tell him what size clothes to wear. He was a medium.
I’ve been saying Mucho much more to my Spanish friends lately.
It means a lot to them
Statistically 6 out of 7 Dwarfs aren’t happy.
I didn’t think wearing orthopedic shoes would help me.
But I stand corrected
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with but I was tripping all day.
French archaeologists found ancient copper cables under Paris…
They came to the conclusion that the French had telecommunications way back in the Copper age. Infuriated by this, the British published a paper saying they found Bronze cables under London and came to the conclusion that they had telecommunication technology way before the French.
After hearing this, the Americans did some digging and found iron cables and came to the conclusion that they were the first to have telecommunication technology.
Undeterred, the Indians did they own digging under the ancient city of Varanasi but found nothing, they came to conclusion that ancient Indians had wireless technology way before anyone.
Easy know there’s no knackers in Paris