The Terrible Joke Thread

61

That isnā€™t too bad .

62

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall ?

Art .

63

What do you call a goofy slaphead from humberside

1 Like
64

Humbergoofyslap?

65

Art

1 Like
66

Hickory Dickory Dock
Three mice ran up the clock
The clock struck one
And the other two escaped with minor injuries

67

Multi-storey car park theft. Thatā€™s just wrong on so many levels.

68

Can some one of the moderators please ban this mong?

1 Like
69

Throwing acid is wrong, in some peopleā€™s eyes

4 Likes
70

Whatā€™s the definition of endless love?

Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles playing tennis.

3 Likes
71

1 Like
72
73

A man who took an airline company to court after losing his luggage, has lost his case.

2 Likes
74

Paddy English man, Paddy Irish man and Paddy Nigerian man are all in the maternity hospital after their wives gave birth to sons. The nurse comes out and says Iā€™m afraid thereā€™s been a terrible mix up and we donā€™t know which baby is which.
After thinking for a few minutes Paddy Irishman says Iā€™ll sort this. He returns a few minutes later with what is clearly Paddy Nigerianā€™s baby. What are you doing sayā€™s Paddy Nigerian thatā€™s clearly my baby.
Look says Paddy Irishman thereā€™s a 50/50 chance that one of the others is English and thatā€™s a risk Iā€™m not willing to take.

4 Likes
75

Did you hear about the slow bicycle? It was two tired.

76

Paddy English man, Paddy Irishman and Paddy Scotsman are having a pint.
As it happens three flies flew into their drinks at the same time.
Paddy Englishman pushes his pint away in disgust and orders a new one.
Paddy Scotsman picks out the fly and goes on drink his pint, unperturbed.
Meanwhile Paddy Irishman picks out the fly, places him on the counter, presses down on his stomach and roars ā€œspit it out you bastard!!!ā€

77

The guy who invented the throat lozenge has died. Thereā€™ll be no coffin at his funeral.

2 Likes
78

I donā€™t get it, how was it clearly Paddy Nigeriamanā€™s baby?

79

He was wearing a traditional Nigerian outfit

1 Like
80

And offered to transfer funds from a cousin, a Royal family member, if I gave him my account details.

Very advanced child.

1 Like