Joe Root has resigned.
Inevitable
Thus begins the ECB root and branch reform
This one is better
3 Likes
Ruh ruh ruh roh
BREAKING: Reports are emerging that Boris Johnson was pouring drinks for guests at one of the work meetings he did not know was a party x
Conv +4
In other UK news, I was out on the bike with my oul pal lodgy on Sunday, (famous for getting me in hot water by answering his phone accidentally).
Anyhow, he was looking a bit chagrined as he said his mother in law is a pain in the hole, and getting worse. He said himself and his wife had a big row about it the other night, which ended in him saying, “look I always knew she was a pain in the ass, but she’s actually not a nice person at all”.
This duly ended in lodgy in the spare room, and his wife deciding to continue the row by text in the middle of the night.
A text arrived “Listen xxxxx, how dare you say that about my mother. I know you don’t like her, and she’s annoyed you for years, but to say she is a bad person is a horrible thing to say”.
Of course, by Freudian slip, his darling wife actually sent the message to her mother instead of lodgy.
“And yesterday,” lodgy ruefully went on “was the first time I saw the mil since the incident, so you think your life is bad, try my shoes”
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An acquaintance went home with a girl he met in a bar, a mad night ensued…“all roads and directions” apparently. The next morning he slips on her ‘robe’ and heads off to the euphemism…he then returns to the room, slips off her ‘robe’ and was about to hop back into bed when he notices it contains 3 unfamiliar horrified wimmin…wrong room. The wimmin were his girl’s flatmate, her sister and mother- they all unexpectedly had to stay the night due to some automobile calamity. Unperturbed he returns to the correct room, where more “thrashing around” occurred.
His romantic interest only found out about his detour when her friend’s mother stopped speaking/advised her daughter to move out and away from her childhood friend.
In hope of redemption a letter of apology was carefully and sensitively written- assurances given included that such behaviour was out of character, that the relationship was both lengthy and serious, that it was in fact their first night together, alcohol had been consumed (an unfamiliar experience in itself) etc.
By a common enough twist of fate the letter was delivered, not to the flatmate’s mother but her grandmother- a pious, respectable and now scandalised woman.
6 Likes
Sir Keir on fire here
It happened a friend of mine. He brought a girl back from the nightclub to their holiday house in west clare. Gave her “a right seeing to” that night and the next morning.
He went down to the kitchen in his jocks to get a drink only to find his aunt and uncle looking mortified in the kitchen. They had arrived down the previous night unknowns to him. His aunt declared they were off to mass “to pray for that poor girl”.
18 Likes
I watched Patel’s statement on the Rwanda craic earlier.
She is just awful.
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Blackford to be ejected 1/100
Boris ducking and diving with some ease here.
“Sincere apologies etc”
The cut and thrust is some comparison compared to Mick Healy Rae roaring at someone
Mark Harper with the dagger
Sammy is standing by his man
Fabricant is several sheets to the wind 
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Just after switching this on now. Boris seems a bit rattled
Shaken not stirred?
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Girl I know went home with a lad. Very drunk. She got up in middle of night, needed to pee and got back into bed. Beside his mother and father.
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Boris is a political heaveyweight. It will take more then Covid to take him down. Only lightweight nobodies like Matt Hancock and Big Phil got the boot over Covid
1 Like