Good man @artfoley
Apart from the vegan bit. I’d make an effort.
What boiled my piss was when I got dragged up to Lancaster by herself to friends who’ve gone vegan. I think it’s a great effort, and understand and admire it, but they inflicted a fully vegan dinner on us, which was just well inedible. I got given out to then for being rude for not eating it. Worst thing was the starter was bad, the main course has a “broccoli cheese” made with some product that tasted like melted plastic, which made me want to retch. They brought out a delicious looking chocolate cake for pudding. I was starving so I took a huge slice. It was worse again. Apparently neither chocolate nor cake are vegan. You couldn’t even try to eat it. The hostess asked did I not like it, and there was nothing I could say except I was sorry, but it was one of the most disgusting things I’d ever tried to eat. She laughed. Wifey didn’t. My observation was that had they come to us, we’d have made them some vegan dinner, and they should have extended the courtesy.
I even had to drive 
Agreed. People should enclose a Statement of Means in the card, along with the cash.
AUDITED financial statements.
Christmas weddings are an abomination. 2 in 24 already. Ive told her to fall out with one of them, i dont mind which one personally
A celebration of love at the most wonderful time of the year, what could be better 
Making my own plans enjoying a peaceful Christmas
I can understand them to an extent as the likelihood is a lot of guests are off work (although my Mrs had to go from work to Birr just in time for the dinner for last Christmas one I had) but winter ones (especially November and January) are clearly people doing it on the cheap and expecting people to travel in potentially wintery conditions.
A fella give myself and Mrs KP an anonymous donation to ‘Bothar’ as our wedding present. I haven’t saluted him on the road since.
I used to think, “I’ll get that cunt back yet” but he’s too mean to marry.
We’d give them as Christmas presents or to teachers etc but would draw the line at a wedding, shows he thought you weren’t stuck for a few Bob
i was badly stuck for a bob in 2009 (as many were) as it turns out
A few gave us one4all vouchers or vouchers for builders merchants, which were appreciated as we were building at the time
Sure the beneficiaries of the Borhar gift weren’t doing much better 
true 
The brother and his wife got a pup out of a good coursing bitch as a wedding present
A lovely gift!
Christ
One year we had a boss we didn’t like. A nice guy but a shit manager.
Last day before Christmas he bought us all gifts. Books, etc. Out of his own pocket. We chip in between us for one of those Bothar things as a real lame last minute thing. By God, he was fucking delighted with it. Said it was so thoughtful of us.
Haven’t been at a wedding in 10 years thanks be to God. The last one I was at the marriage lasted 5 months as did the one as I was at before that in 2005.That’s the way it’s gone now.
The last one I was at in 2013 I had just got the first knee replaced and at 10 o clock I said to the bride I’m terribly sorry I’m too tired to stay up any longer and I headed off on my crutches. I went back to my room ordered a load of drink from room service , put on Match of the Day and had a grand owl night of it
You probably jousted with a few on TFK the same night