My brother in law is a sultry 28, he was going out with a girl 2 years his senior for over six years.
She broke up with him at the weekend as he didn’t want to have kids in the next 12 months. She said that she wanted kids in the next year and that was it, he didn’t want to make the commitment so they parted ways. He’s very upset about this. He wants to raise a family eventually but just not yet. He even contemplated trying for a child just to keep her happy. She told him her ‘biological clock’ was ticking and she didn’t have much time left. Crazy. Does she think that she will find a new partner to form a solid relationship with and have a child with, inside the next 12 months?
I had my first at a relatively young age, in my early twenties. I have to say I’d be in a pickle if this had happened to me. Have any of you lads had a similar experience with birds of this age?
I’d say she had been subtly testing the waters for a while to she what would have been a dealbreaker in the relationship and pre-empted that your brother would not have been willing at this stage to have a child queue the break up.She is at a stage now where she could possibly have one last throw of the dice at a relationship and the thought probably occurred to her ‘will I settle’ for this situation or try again.I have a lot of symapthy for your brother.Women can be ruthless at times.I’m sure he wont waste any time over Christmas.
Certainly doesn’t add up. I’d be fairly suspect if she is spotted out and about with someone else… I wouldn’t rule out the friends element either. Are a few of them recently settled, marriage or house etc? The shit some of them can put in their friends heads and the need to try and keep up from said friend can be unreal. Insecure cunts the lot of them.
You could be spot on with this theory Whiplash. Would she really want to end a 6 year relationship because he didn’t want to have a child within 12 months? Then again maybe she wants to be a mother at 30 so as to have time for another one. She’s hardly going to find another man in the next 12 months that is happy to go down the family route that quickly. You’d be surprised how upset he is over this, he wouldn’t be the type to go on the pull though.
Its pretty obvious what is going on here. She is going out with your man 6 years. Her family and friends probably on to her the whole time about ‘when are ye giving us a dayout’. She was looking for commitment from her other half. She brought up the ‘biological clock’ as a step towards talking about marriage. When her partner failed to take the bait, she decided to bail.
Very interesting take here Fenners, marriage neve came up in the conversation I had with him but she could have had ulterior motives. He told her that he wasn’t ready to start a family and couldn’t see himself doing so in the next 12 months. She said that was that, as they had such different views on such a very important life choice. I told him that she’ll be back because she won’t find anyone else willing to start a family in the next 12 months. He’s not so optimistic. It could well be pressure from her family as she is the eldest in her family and her younger sister had a child over the summer.
I know of a one like that where I used to work. and she did it at the same time too, just before christmas. she dumped her fella coz he didnt want to get married (6 or 7 years together). they ended up getting back together anyway, and a year later, coming up to Valentines, he proposed. she came to work all delighted (and after arranging the whole wedding that weekend for 3 months and a week later). I was saying whats the rush, take your time and all that, and she ended up snapping at me, ‘I’m nearly 30, I have to be married’.
Yer man said he didnt want any kids though, and he was a dick, cheating on her the whole time. She was pregnant within a month of the wedding. she didnt tell him she went off the pill. He sent a text the day his child was born ‘well fuck this for a load of shit’. he didnt even tell anyone where he worked that his wife was expecting, and took no time off either. still went on cheating on her, and she knew about it too. As far as I know they are still together. She is probably the extreme, but for whatever reason, some women have this thing about being sorted by 30.
to be honest, your brother could be better off in the long run. if she is pulling this kind of shit now, how bad will it end up?
Jesus women are evil. Tell him to forget her TTK. He’s 28, he’s got a potential catchment age of anywhere between 23 and 30, that’s plenty to aim at. He could even dip his toe in the 19 to 22 bracket for a bit of craic.
Brian is dead right here. Your job here as his brother is to guide him through this transition and get him up on one of these young things so he can see what fun he could be having instead of lamenting for this she-devil.
TTK - I can’t stress this enough - do not let him contact her. If he makes the first effort at contacting her then it’s curtains, she’s in the driving seat and will know he’s hanging around dying to get back with her. This will only mean her stringing it out even further. In her warped evil woman mind she’ll be thinking the can go out for a few months or weeks, testing the waters knowing she’s got some lad who is desperate to take her back if she needs.
If he is seen to be moving on (even if he doesn’t want to) then she’ll want him back ASAP. Women are evil, jealous cnuts, this is how they operate. If he does want her back then good luck to him, she’ll want to get back with him. At least he’ll have a fall back option.
If he gets one little boost of confidencem, he’ll never look back. Send him to New York for a few days to get jiggy with some American lovelies.
The battle for control of this relationship is hanging in the balance - tell him to stand strong and stand tall. TFK is right behind him.
Jesus women are like vultures, why can’t they just leave us alone???