“sluttish past”
Ah god… You would cry with laughter. The home of mewling…
I am nearly going to drink a glass of that Lagavulin.
Hes gone to seed now
Well, what does she make of your past promiscuity? Or maybe you haven’t told her.
There’s an algorithm for that.
Any number a woman tells you, add ten.
Any number a man tells you, half it
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500 is some going in fairness, the man is a stallion
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I doubt I’ve had sex 500 times
Does wanking count?
Non consensual?
It’ll have to at this stage.
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Here’s another algorithm, the fellow who talks about the wan encounter for twenty years maybe only ever got it the wance. If at all.
Personally I think Malarkey’s next ride will be his first. The way he talks about it oozes awkwardness and sexual inadequacy.
We’d a fella around here that’s currently on gardening leave that seemed to be as prolific as yourself with the ladies. He posted images of wads of fifties prior to meeting them.
There’s no maybe in an algorithm
Non-consenual wanking?
What kind of deviants are there in Leix at all??
That happened to me down sonnys lane
Maybe
How would you not nearly choke yourself with laughter at this eejit?
All easily done, especially after late 1986. I was 19, back in Dublin for the second year. A friend from home, the previous year’s flatmate, knew a girl – later his sister in law – with a house in Ranelagh. Herself and the housemate were on holiday. So we were given the house for a fortnight, while we looked for a new flat.
Worked out great, with a flat found on Charleston Road. Worked out still better when the women arrived back and we met for a drink. The housemate was from the Midlands, 29 or 30, deceptive quiet in Civil Service mode. She took a shine to me, on first meeting, and asked me back to the house. Most straightforward, what she wanted, and I was delighted to oblige.
Went over once or twice a week for around six months. All uncomplicated, save for the fact that their holiday was to close off the fact that she had been to England for an abortion after an affair with a local (married) TD. 1980s Ireland…
Middle age is so strange. She is over 60 now, maybe a grandmother, and I often wonder where she is, what way her life went. I think people who see her every day, who think they know her well, would be amazed at the filth she screamed at a young lad from South Kilkenny in a house in Ranelagh.
But: a fine way to learn the ropes, so to speak.
That sex owed you absolutely nothing by the age of 30 is a terrific thing for the middle-aged head.
Do not get me started on the odd married/separated woman during those years…
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Could it ever get any better, even after 14 point All Ireland defeat…?
I am overcome.
The way the comment was written was excellent.
Im a fan of good prose and in fairness you are raising the bar here.
Look, the title of the thread lacks decorum and to say it is adolescent in nature would be an injustice to teenagers - i cannot understand how on this earth reasonable folk are getting their nickers in a twist about what was it we said “overgrown children who still live with their parents” playing a hurling match, its a game , its over and by and large the result is irrelevant …
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Fair enough.
Thanks.