Coffee thread, aka a thread for spoofers

781

I was in Dunnes yesterday and lad ahead of me had Gold Blend (Nescafé) on the conveyor belt along with other groceries. He goes through and has a quick word with the cashier and goes off to get something he forgot. Was gone about 5 minutes.

A year ago I’d have seethed silently. Now I waited patiently.

I subsequently followed him out to his car. I was able to catch up with him as he was in a mobility scooter.

I beat him quite viciously around the head and face and left him overturned in his scooter.

6 Likes
782

A lovely story, one which fills me with hope.
Hopefully the bastard bleeds out

783

Why did you beat him?
Was it because he bought Gold Blend?

784

Fuck him and his mobility scooter, la di fucking dah.

785

Perhaps he was in a cycle lane. CC @Little_Lord_Fauntleroy

786

These die hard coffee snobs are vicious - If your choice of coffee doesnt hit at least a 6 on the hipster scale you need to tool up for your own protection.

787

I’m on the decaf myself of late.

788

You’re a dead man walking

789

Getting to that age now alright.

1 Like
790

Hipster coffee drinkers are worse than nescafe drinkers. They should be burned alive

791

The missus like Maxwell House. I’m thinking of divorce

1 Like
792

Instant coffee doesn’t give you grounds for divorce

1 Like
793

We’ve all bean there

1 Like
794

Steamer

795

Is she a big girl?

796

No; have you a fetish for big wans?

798

799

@Bandage bump.
please arrange.

1 Like
800

what does this have to do with coffee?

801

What’s this, pal? I haven’t been following this thread for a couple of years.