did you head off down the wrong side of the motorway? I nearly did that last week and had to pull in and compose myself
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My brother had to wait three and a half hours for a rental car at Orlando Airport earlier this year
America is a backward country in so many ways
Not in terms of rental cars in this instance though - I think itâs great that people have to wait so long for them - think of it as an environmentally friendly tax for not taking public transport
Well done Orlando Airport and well done Dublin
You donât expect a man of my importance to be driving surely?
Labaneâs holiday off to a traditional start - a joust with Sidney.
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Why did it take you ten minutes to find an email?
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Things that are right thread. A mugged off yank.
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They sent me back to the âtop of the queueâ.
Why hadnât you the email to hand like a normal person?
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Iâm so rattled I had to stop in Roscrea for a pint. Fucking Roscrea.
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A normal person would expect them to have a record of the booking you made in your name. Which of course they had, just couldnât be arsed looking for it.
Youâre on the wrong road
Roscrea is not on the route from Dublin Airport to any part of Galway
Drink driving is also prohibited in Ireland, much as âlibertariansâ might rage against this
why donât you fuck off back so.
you wonât get any of your fake plastic âhave a good day, Sirâ everywhere here.
Youâll be a gibbering wreck going back after having food fucked on your table in restaurants, and bar men to tell you go fuck yourself, you can have a toastie or a pack of taytos.
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Things that are wrong.
Exiles who come back to Ireland who spend their whole holiday moaning about how shit Ireland is and how advanced their new home is. And tell everyone within earshot about the big shot they are back where they now reside. They look well down the local, âoh look, hereâs Billy big bollix home for the weekend to tell us all how shit we are. Ah sure, at least heâll fuck off back home in a couple of days.â.
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Iâm not going to Galway mate, and not driving, so you donât have to worry about my safety or your safety.
he started in the fucking airport⌠took photos and all 
barely off the plane and couldnt help himself.
In much better news, it hasnât rained yet.
probably critiqued the standard of tarmac on the runway before giving the pilot a big american round of applause for sitting there while the computer flew the plane
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youâll probably give out that the rain is too wet, not like good old dry american rain
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This is the same cunt who thinks its grand to put up all sorts of ridiculous barriers to black people voting in the US
And he expects to just stroll up to a desk and take a car out without him even showing the rental company a record of his booking