Indeed, briantinnion’s posts on the ‘Living Alone’ thread don’t tally in with the gentleman who last week snubbed his football team’s end of season drinks to instead go on a date. With a lady. brian, I wish you the very best of luck in these heady early days of romance. Of course, I similarly offer my very best wishes to Farmer. It can only be good for the astro team in the long run to have the majority of our players settled down.
I was completely unaware of this development. I spoke to Tinnion that day and he assured me that he was going to attend. When he didn’t show I assumed it was due to mental health reasons.
I actually went into Kehoes and couldn’t find anyone, tried calling you and Clarkey without success. I want to assure everyone on the forum that I most certainly do not have a girlfriend, nor do I have any interest in finding a girlfriend. I’m quite happy to spend my weekends wallowing in depression and misery do not not feel the need to share any of this time with a girl.
I see a few lads here that could badly do with a bit of advice, don’t worry about her road frontage tis the size of her salary that should concern ye, all public servants are good, they come with pensions, some come with handcuffs and some have about 5 months holiday a year. Ye also need to be careful that her assets aren’t too heavily leveraged or you could be getting a pig in a poke… Land always good so long as you’re not paying for it
UPDATE: My good friend cesc4 now has a tap in within the same block of apartments that he lives in. Basically, he bumped into her on the corridor one morning just as he was leaving for work and she said something like, ‘Oh, I guessed a guy lived along here as I get a lovely smell of aftershave every morning.’ Silly bitch. So he had a bit of small talk with her and it was clearly apparent that she was gagging for cock. She mentioned how she lived on her own, found it a bit quiet in the evenings etc so cesc4 took the bull by the horns and suggested they go for a drink some time and they swapped numbers.
He said at the time that he wasn’t sure how ugly she was as he was too close to really get a good look at her but he went ahead and sent her a text a few days later and they went for a drink. It turned out she’s a plump, little 33-year old dog but she invited him in for a drink when they got back from the pub that night and he banged her. We told him it had stalker potential and she started texting him all the time and parking her car beside his in the car park and stuff. She’s text him things like, ‘Are you at home? Can you hear that alarm going off?’
He doesn’t mind for the moment and generally goes on the lash with the lads and texts her for a ride if there’s nothing doing in town. He told us that he was banging her one night recently and she leaned over and got something out of her drawer. Next thing there was splodgy sound and it transpired that she was lubing her hand, arm and elbow up before launching a fist up cesc4’s hole.
FURTHER UPDATE: cesc4 and I were down in the pub the Friday before last and we decided that we weren’t going to text tap ins and nor were we going to Copper’s. So there we were in Copper’s around 5 or 6 hours later and cesc4 dropped a bombshell and said, ‘Look I’ve been texting two tap ins on the sly any time you were at the bar or taking a piss so I’m probably going to fook off to bang one of them shortly.’ During the course of the textual back and forth, he discovered that his plump neighbour was on the blob so he went off and rode another wan and told tubby that he was heading back to one of the lads’ houses or something.
That was grand and he was back in his gaff the next evening when tubby text him saying, ‘I’ve been out drinking wine with one of the girls all day and I’m a little bit tipsy - do you want to come over and play?’ Now, cesc4 was sober again at this point and had absolutely no interest whatsoever in seeing this whale so he waited an hour or so and politely replied saying he was wrecked after the night before and wasn’t going out. Straight away, she responded asking, ‘Are you at home?’ It then became apparent that this was entering the stalker territory we had warned him about - he didn’t reply to that text and, a short while later, there was a few loud thumps on the door. He muted his TV, stayed quiet and didn’t answer and next thing his phone, which luckily was on silent, started going off.
Yes, the fat bitch was outside hammering on his door. He said she stood outside, leaving him loads of missed calls and rattling the door for about ten minutes before he heard her sturdy footsteps trudging back down the corridor to her own place. Then he got another text saying something like, ‘So you’re not answering your door or your phone now?’ Bear in mind that this was only around 8pm last Saturday night. cesc4 being the sick cunt that he is wasn’t too deterred by this act of complete stalkerdom and instead decided that he would like to leave the tap in opportunity open so he texted back at around 11pm saying, ‘I must have fallen asleep - only getting your messages now. I’m really in bits from last night and going to bed now etc’.
Then we were down in the pub just this Friday night gone and cesc4 was absolutely hammered and started texting her. The tubby wan was gagging for it and was telling him to get home as quickly as possible. cesc4 had a text exchange that went something like this:
‘I don’t have any condoms.’
‘I do…’
‘How many?’
‘How many what?’
‘Condoms and fingers?’
‘Enough and as many as you want…’
cesc4 then slipped quietly away to have the fat girl shove her hand up his hole again. I haven’t heard from him since.
