Signing in. Don’t like it but has to be done. First of 4 (four) visits to the hygienist 
Are you just getting a clean? You’ll pull through 40 minutes of being uncomfortable
Worth it, I picture most of the lads on here with teeth like gravestones.
4 trips? You must be rotten.
Rotting with money. She must be good looking, that’s all I’ll say.
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Not rotten with money no but she is descant tbf. The only solace I had through the hour was her resting her chest on my forehead as she rooted out all the plaque
Descant? She was descant?
From the guy that incorrectly pulled me up for grammar/spelling early in the lockdown when tensions were high.
FFS sake.
My apologies mate, for both pulling you up early in the lockdown and for my miss-spelling. I meant to write daycent.
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Flatty will be PMing you looking for her number.
Thought I was going in for a filling, turns out the tooth needed to come out. One near the back at the top. Mouth is hanging off me
In an all-encompassing tour today I took in a funeral in Ballyconnell, a tank of kerosene (1,000 ltr @25c - Cassidy’s) and a dental appointment in Malanphy’s in Derrylin’s. The visit to Cassidy’s was on the final leg of the voyage.
I was nearly fucking shell-shocked when hitting the Dentist to be soothed by, not Aiden himself, but his wife Roisín. She put me at ease with that oul’ border charm those gals have, told me Aiden was doing implants in Belfast on the day and wasn’t available.
Between bullshit and soft talk she prepped the stump, suggested various procedures ahead and levered out the stump with the smoothness of wiping a baby’s arse.
We’re pencilled in for a series of things in about 10 days, I’ll be there. She’s very efficient.
Mar focail scoir, unconfirmed, Cassidy tells me the man himself is away in the John of God’s on a dry-out rather than whip-out programme.
Gas cunts these border folk. I’ve had 3 substantiated Jemmys to settle the nerves.
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Diesel, Dentist and Drink. A great day out entirely…
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I omitted the coup dé gras, the dentistry was invoiced through the Ballyconnell practice, thereby availing of the Medical Card scheme. Everywhere you find an ass - ride him…
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I omitted Death. Call it a coup de gras also if you like.
I know it’s an old cliché, but seriously what is it with these sadistic cunts and the need to strike up a conversation while they have various bits of squealing machinery and a hoover in your mouth?
“Where are you from anyways Mr Pike?”
“Luuuuurrrrrmk”
“That’s lovely. And who was your last dentist?”
“Jurrrrg Crrrrrrnnnnnunnun”
“I don’t think I know him. He hasn’t put a crown on the tooth that had the root canal done, do you know why that is?”
“Nrrrrrg fhulknnnnn urrrrrgeea”
“Anyways, we’d recommend a crown always for a root canal Mr Pike. Let’s talk pricing options.”
“Urrrg”
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Tbh and fair I’d a buddy in Derry a dentist and from him years ago it’s a highly stressful job and some can’t handle physically hurting ppl through dentistry, suppose like lots of careers it suits some better than others
Call Kenny Loggins.
If it was any kind of a proper town, the undertaker, kerosene agent and dentist would have been the same lad.
I’m in the clear, antibiotics. €30 visit. Grandest.
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