Of course I do.
You are fairly pathetic in fairness.
You might be gay fella.
Had that ever crossed your mind.
[QUOTE=“caoimhaoin, post: 1067149, member: 273”]Of course I do.
You are fairly pathetic in fairness.[/QUOTE]
No, you don’t, it’s a generalisation. The importance of sex in a relationship will depend on the sexual appetite of each partner. Again, you are showing yourself to be emotionally undeveloped.
How would you know?
[QUOTE=“caoimhaoin, post: 1067150, member: 273”]You might be gay fella.
Had that ever crossed your mind.[/QUOTE]
No.
[QUOTE=“caoimhaoin, post: 1067131, member: 273”]Smoking weed and taking pills can get some wonderful conversations going.
[/QUOTE]
My hero. 
It’s a generalisation that contradicts what I know from myself.
So you’re a drug fiend?
No.
You should consider it.
I’d move away from South Armagh though if it comes to pass.
Good luck
[QUOTE=“caoimhaoin, post: 1066946, member: 273”]I was on about au pairs etc. I actually said they should not work or work less, the 2nd part you conveniently let out.
I have said all along that some people are unavoidably in that situation. Some of their own doing, some unfortunate/unlucky.
The main thrust of my point is people are continuing to do it. Trying to read up that is. Maybe it’s a generation thing that you are seeing.
However there are people all over here where I live with the mother at home or in part time work. One guy I know is a van driver for a butchers, how is he doing it?
I believe, and again this is the maths side of it (and I do know well what it costs to live here) you both don’t Have to work in a lot of cases. And that as TUM points out it’s a personal decision to work and it’s about having ABC material things which we have become accustomed to. My personal belief, and I don’t need to have kids to believe this, is that the kid loses out by having 2 working parents, especially if it’s some au pair coming in. I think, and I will do this, some career sacrifices have to be made for the sake of the kids sometimes. Anything else is just selfish. Ye may not like that, but I don’t really give a fuck. I believe in many cases it’s just parents racing to be the most successful at whatever and forgetting what’s important.
Then again maybe not everybody should have kids or have them till ready.
Obviously not directed at anyone in particular, just a general view.[/QUOTE]
What’s your issue with au pairs?
[QUOTE=“caoimhaoin, post: 1066946, member: 273”]I was on about au pairs etc. I actually said they should not work or work less, the 2nd part you conveniently let out.
I have said all along that some people are unavoidably in that situation. Some of their own doing, some unfortunate/unlucky.
The main thrust of my point is people are continuing to do it. Trying to read up that is. Maybe it’s a generation thing that you are seeing.
However there are people all over here where I live with the mother at home or in part time work. One guy I know is a van driver for a butchers, how is he doing it?
I believe, and again this is the maths side of it (and I do know well what it costs to live here) you both don’t Have to work in a lot of cases. And that as TUM points out it’s a personal decision to work and it’s about having ABC material things which we have become accustomed to. My personal belief, and I don’t need to have kids to believe this, is that the kid loses out by having 2 working parents, especially if it’s some au pair coming in. I think, and I will do this, some career sacrifices have to be made for the sake of the kids sometimes. Anything else is just selfish. Ye may not like that, but I don’t really give a fuck. I believe in many cases it’s just parents racing to be the most successful at whatever and forgetting what’s important.
Then again maybe not everybody should have kids or have them till ready.
Obviously not directed at anyone in particular, just a general view.[/QUOTE]
Your personal belief is that children lose out by having two working parents. What studies or empirical evidence are you basing this personal belief on?
There are studies out there that show this. But there are more out there thy show child development can be very reliant on time spent with parents.
However on a purely emotional level you don’t need any study to know that the more time you are with your child, or anyone generally, the closer you become. Now this security and comfort has to help a child develop and build confidence etc. if Au Pairs etc are in the mix it creates confusion of sorts.
I have no problem with au pairs per say, but they existed really for diplomats or oil workers etc. I heard over Christmas a number of times “I have the kids on my own, the au pair has gone home”. That to me is kinda fucked.
And it’s not just the well to do either. I never asked the cost, but an au pair for say 20 hours a week must be expensive. What’s the point in working to just hand most of it over to someone else to mind your kid?
4 bags of chips and a slice pan would do the trick as well.
Not solely. There were many factors involved.
Btw, one person working 10-20 hours and the other working 40 is not what I’m talking about. I would consider that balanced.
- someone bringing in main wage
- 2nd person adding to it with a bit in the side, which also doubles up as their own time and maintains a sort of working life
- spends most of the rest of the time with kids
- can maybe take in more as they age
- ideally help of grand parents helps, but certainly, as said here, a couple of days crèche is no harm either for socialization
- spend at least one whole day of weekend completely together
I’d say that’s very do-able, cost effective and most importantly healthy.
[QUOTE=“farmerinthecity, post: 1067096, member: 24”]No - a career in prostitution.
Like your sister.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=“TheUlteriorMotive, post: 1067112, member: 2272”]A rich man is a man who earns more than his sister-in-law’s husband
Everything is relative
Consider a choice between these two worlds and assume they both are real purchasing power so in World A you have a 10 per cent bigger house, 10% more money, 10% better car
World A: You earn €110,000 per year, others earn €200,000.
World B: You earn €100,000 per year, others earn €85,000.
What would you pick?[/QUOTE]
As someone once said ; " it is not enough to succeed in life, those around you must fail"
[QUOTE=“caoimhaoin, post: 1067180, member: 273”]There are studies out there that show this. But there are more out there thy show child development can be very reliant on time spent with parents.
However on a purely emotional level you don’t need any study to know that the more time you are with your child, or anyone generally, the closer you become. Now this security and comfort has to help a child develop and build confidence etc. if Au Pairs etc are in the mix it creates confusion of sorts.
I have no problem with au pairs per say, but they existed really for diplomats or oil workers etc. I heard over Christmas a number of times “I have the kids on my own, the au pair has gone home”. That to me is kinda fucked.
And it’s not just the well to do either. I never asked the cost, but an au pair for say 20 hours a week must be expensive. What’s the point in working to just hand most of it over to someone else to mind your kid?[/QUOTE]
The studies you are referencing are most likely based on children from 0-3 years of age as this is when attachments are formed. Most people will work 3/4 days per week after having children with parental leave etc. Once a child has an appropriate attachment it will not make a difference whether both or one parent works.
If your children are of school going age, finishing school at 3pm etc. if you have an au pair they will only be caring for your child for 3/4 hours max per day. The reason people have au pairs is because they are generally cheaper than the creche costing approx 80-100 per week.