Manchester Utd 2023/24 (Part 1)

I was playing U14 hurling while an U12, I wasn’t flip hot or nothing, we just didn’t have numbers. I was picked corner forward one day and as I strolled in, I turned to the 14 year old picked in the other corner and asked him what side should I go. ‘Doesn’t matter to me MBB, I can hurl off either side’ says my man.

It didn’t take long for us all to realise me man couldn’t hurl snow off either side of a rope. He didn’t make it to half time. I didn’t make it much past the half time meself either but that’s because I was knocked half unconscious by the full back.

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Haggers has them out running laps again

https://twitter.com/ManUnitedZone_/status/1719004430098378903?t=cfHKEfPBJ3hRmCBtAtFF-g&s=19

:sleeping::sleeping::sleeping::sleeping::sleeping:
No-one is interested in these child prodigy prowess feats of strength type anecdotes, mate. Honestly!

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If he’s going to make it at the top level he needs to learn to beat up his own sisters and mother

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There was a fella here once who won a Foyle Cup medal or something to that effect and he never got a bit of credit for it. He was blackguarded the poor unfortunate gobshite.

All the good kids are going to Citeh

bring in gerlock as a conditioning coach, have them bating tyres with hurls and running up hills til they puke

I think there were reasons other than football.

No wonder they don’t run on the pitch. They are flahed from a double session of laps in the morning.

Is he still running alongside them in the punishment runs?

And there you go. What do players know about fitness. Fatigue my ring. They get plenty of rest time. Clock is ticking on Ten Hag. Players leaking stories, press mocking his post match quotes.

As an aside, who was the last decent* centre half United’s academy produced? (*decent by utd standards which isn’t too high).

Jonny Evans himself; before that, Ryan Shawcross if you’d consider him decent.

Not counting Pique as he only moved over when he was 17.

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Johnny “you go and shtand over there erling” Evans.

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There is absolutely no way ten hag Is even close to being under pressure for his job.

Michael Keane has over 200 premier league appearances. He’s a better player than Ryan shawcross.

So who were the fans booing on Sunday?

He is the worst defender in the league.

MEN has that he’s got until Christmas mate.
I heard a belter about what Jim rat-cliff plans.

Brailsford?

Worse (or better depending on your viewpoint). Brailsford is an absolute spoofer.