No room for the Wheelie Bin @myboyblue
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Did he never win an All Ireland?
You can’t make spurious allegations of that nature any more . He was however, the 1st. Sligo recipient of an All-Star.
His All-Ireland semi-final appearance against Kerry didn’t go so well for him however. Having craftily beaten John O’Keeffe in the first aerial duel Johnno proceeded to kick lumps out of him and Sligo’s aspirations collapsed.
He was the leading marksman in the National league for many years coming to the position just as Leitrim’s Cathal Flynn retired from the role. 
Did he not have difficulty with the law in the matter of livestock that weren’t his?
Oooft.
He did and there may indeed have been litigation to resolve the matter.
Is there more of the Paddy Downey report handy? I have some scrambled idea that Kearnes missed a penalty not that it would have altered the outcome.
The quip about the waistline was pure gold……Kearnes was never the slimmest.
I’ll see what I can post up.
Many thanks Fagan. The report makes grim reading for the Magpies and the result was even worse than I remember. That Kerry team however evolved into one of the greatest of all time so maybe there’s a crumb of comfort there.
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Limerickness XV
1 Joe Quaid (the most important person in a family business is the first one to carry it on, future generations are then automatically blackmailed into it)
2 TJ Ryan (More Limerick than voting for a Collins)
3 Richie McCarthy (Pat Hartigan didn’t have songs sung about him by a load of J1 students in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina)
4 Tom Condon (The sort of corner back who’d routinely be beaten by getting out ahead of his marker and finding himself running too quickly to gather the ball, whereupon the ball goes through him, he falls over, and Bubbles O’Dwyer finishes clinically)
5 Clem Smith (Looked like a shy and retiring fella)
6 Ciaran Carey (Apparently once scored a point against Clare)
7 Mark Foley (head down, run into two men, turn to the right, shake them off and lash it. Or else get fouled, do a little fist pump and a scowl, performatively pump your shoulders, look down at the ground and walk away like Jimmy Sloyan. Never, ever smile.)
8 Richie Bennis (“Richie, Richie Richie, whattaya gonna do? It’s a goooal!” The centrepiece of all Limerickness. Rumoured to be Santa Claus)
9 Mike Houlihan (Had a very “lived in” face. Hit, hip and whip)
10 Frankie Carroll (It was all about the laid back, upright posture, sort of like Forrest Gump, like a box of chocolates, you never knew what you were going to get. People have been known to come to out of long spells of clinical depression by studying his posture)
11 Shane Dowling (Medically dangerous for him to hurl after the age of 25)
12 Mike O’Brien (The true spirit of Limerick hurling - swashbuckling and feared nobody, the only problem was he could barely hurl)
13 Donie Ryan (Toerag)
14 Pat Heffernan (Shave a bullock)
15 Eamon Cregan (Crankiness personified. Cranky at having to carry a whole team in an All-Ireland final at 35 years old, cranky at players being afraid to go into a dark room and having to pretend they aren’t, cranky at managing another county to win an All-Ireland against your own county, cranky at a tipsy Ger Loughnane. Crankiness at knowing you’re better than everybody around you.)
Subs
Tommy Quaid (Founder of the family business)
Pat Hartigan (Too good to start)
Shane Fitzgibbon (Nothing said “Limerick scared Tipperary early on but went down to an eight point defeat in this Munster semi-final” like this man’s name. Nippy corner forward who could have played until he was 80 and won nothing)
Pat Ryan (If you want a man to use his head)
Ned Rea (Everybody back to mine for pints, I’ve fixed it so the train will wait)
Cian Lynch (token contemporary representation)
Gary Kirby (Apparently Liam Dunne once pulled across his fingers)
Ollie O’Connor (His name must only be said through the voice of Mick Dunne)
Leo O’Connor (Collars up, short spiky hair, an immediate impact, that’s Limerick cidaaay)
Mark Keane (The future of Limerick hurling)
Kevin Downes (The future of Limerick hurling)
Some lad called Tobin (Mandatory)
Manager: Donal O’Grady (for five minutes before he resigns), then Tom Ryan (subject to an interview with 20 questions)
Selectors: The INTERNET
Crest: Blank
Shaws: Almost Nationwide
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Frankie Carroll and Mike O’Brien hard done by though.
You have some knowledge & memory up top 
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Pure Dublin Hurling XV
In picking a pure Dublin hurling team it’s important to balance things. Due recognition must be given to the old school hackers from the proper hurling clubs, to the tippy tappy new school from the BMW belt of the southside who consistently promise success year after year only to go out with a whimper, and to the blow ins. Due recognition must be given to the fact that following Dublin hurling is essentially a passionless exercise. Nobody is devastated when Dublin are knocked out of the hurling championship, apart from Dublin Hurling Man aka @dubliner2.
1 Gary Maguire (Faceguard fiddler)
2 Tommy McKeon (Inspired Irvine Welsh’s “Filth”)
3 Lar Foley (I somehow overlooked him on my Dublinness football XV, sorry Lar)
4 Des “Snitchy” Ferguson (Didn’t pick the ball off the ground in 1961)
5 Chris Crummey (He must be a tolerant man given what he has to put up with)
6 John Twomey (Good centre back hampered by being on a team of stiffs)
7 Shane Durkin (Elegant and ineffective)
8 Johnny McCaffrey (Captain Mediocre)
9 Sean Kearns (Honest old school plodder with a smashing moustache. My oul’ fella used to attend Dublin hurling matches against hurling counties in the late 80s/early 90s and shout “get in amongst them” like you’d shout at a child. It was a wonderful inadvertant statement of where Dublin stood in the hurling order of things. Kearns was one of the lads who’d be “getting in amongst them”.)
10 Achill Boothman (Achill, like the island)
11 MJ Ryan (Like a lot of Dublin’s best players, not from Dublin)
12 David Treacy (promised the world, delivered fuck all)
13 Dotsy O’Callaghan (Consistently Dublin’s one true inter-county class scoring forward, in the same way Seamus Coleman was Ireland’s one true world class player)
14 Kevin Flynn (The true spirit of Dublin hurling, played for 15 years and barely won a match)
15 Ross O’Carroll (Poster boy for the southsideification of Dublin hurling, decided to join up with the footballers, that worked out well for him)
Subs:
Eamon Dillon (will come on as a sub and score a goal)
Tomás Brady (Decided to play for the footballers, that worked out well for him)
Ger Ennis (Scored a few championship goals which made him mid-late 1990s Dublin hurling’s equivalent of DJ Carey)
Alan McCrabbe (A pioneer of tag hurling, loved a good purposeful run into position after scoring a mid-range free)
Paul Ryan (“Warm up, Ryan, you’re coming off.” “I’ve only just come on.” “Exactly.”)
Shane Dalton (Friend of Eamon Heery)
Niall McMorrow (powder puff)
Fergal Whiteley (talcum powder puff)
Tomas McGrane (Dublin’s one genuine inter-county class forward in the 2000s, in the same way Troy Parrott is Ireland’s one genuine international class forward now)
Seanie McDermott (Seanie the hero of the Hill, or at the least the 30% full Hill when he scored a goal in a Leinster final against Kilkenny)
Declan Qualter (Important to have a plodder from Galway on the bench, this is Dublin hurling after all)
Shane Ryan (A better hurler than a footballer, said everybody, I hope they didn’t watch him play hurling when he came back)
Conal Keaney (Left the footballers in 2010, that worked out well for him)
Manager: Humphrey Kelleher
Aims for the year:
i) “It’s more important that the underage teams do well.” “You say that every year.” “Yes, we’re saying it again.”
ii) To find a travel companion to accompany @dubliner2 to the away league game in Waterford so he won’t pester @Fagan_ODowd on the way back.
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Match report from the Sligo Champion, will be awkward to read 
Bottom one first
Headline is ‘Croke park appearance was a nightmare’ Jim Gray
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Brian McMahon a glaring omission.
Patiently waiting on the Tipp hurling one.
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Many thanks for that effort - truly a bad day for the Magpies. I find it strange that a local correspondent could be quite so critical of what are essentially his own players.
The popular John Connolly of the Leitrim Observer never sees any shortcomings in the locals whether at club or county level - a sign of the times no doubt with the ensuing pitfalls.
Confirmation of my ageing memory comes in the early minutes as the unfortunate Kearnes misses a penalty…… Knowall and all as he was the correspondent didn’t think that much of the Kerry 15 - little did he know.
Cheers for that.
Actually on the front page Barnes Murphy said straight out that there were a number of players that weren’t picked that were better than the players on the field, a strange comment for the captain to make I thought
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