Hilton 
https://twitter.com/jamiekirk1990/status/1794644752912257135?s=46&t=YOfhVM10W0bcyIiYSLI3Wg
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Royal Oak in Harlesden, fuck me the Leeds know how to party
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Armstrong and Smallbone again 
Some atmosphere at the boxing last night too
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.
Farke OUT, Poch IN.
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I heard Farke on radio other day and I was immediately thinking of the Ali g character Bruno.
Phil Hays signoff below from The Athletic
I was 25 when I started covering Leeds United. I also had hair.
Iâm not saying the job has put years on me but I remember a supporter telling me once that to pass the time on the way to a game, the bus he was on had a go at guessing my age. Somebody went with 60. I turn 44 in four months. Half the battle in life is knowing when to stop.
From today, Iâm moving into a new position at The Athletic, producing our global football newsletter full-time. It doesnât mean I wonât ever write about Leeds again, and the scale of our coverage wonât change either, but the baton is passing on after 18 years home and away. If youâre not sick of me by now, then you probably should be. As another journalist joked, Iâve followed the club for longer than is truly healthy â and been exceptionally lucky to do so.
As a sign-off, I wanted to jot down the things Iâve learnt about Leeds United: what they are, how they think, why theyâre addictive and the way in which this job resulted in me getting asked for a selfie in a toilet at Disneyland Paris. They make you lose your hair and your marbles. But theyâre worth it.
The first thing Leeds teach you: theyâre everywhere.
The decorator who painted my bathroom last year, the person who used to shout, âGood morningâ out of his car window on the school run (hello, whoever you were), the random, âCan I get a photo?â by those theme-park urinals; thereâs a Leeds fan born every minute.
Disneyland Paris was only the secondâweirdest selfie request to come my way. First place goes to the one taken in Leeds General Infirmary, a week after Iâd had brain surgery and about 10 minutes after having a laxative inserted where no one wants a laxative inserted. âHowâs it going?â Better than the play-offs, I guess.
Because the play-offs are something Leeds donât do. Leeds to the play-offs are Napoleon to invasions of Russia. Enter with troops massed behind you and die in the snow. They donât do simple, they donât take the clearly-marked path when thereâs a minefield to explore but they donât throw the towel in either. I saw capacity crowds in League One. I saw full away ends at Hereford United, Yeovil Town and Hartlepool United. Leeds rarely get their ticket allocation system right because thereâs no way of getting it exactly right; too much demand, too few seats, forever a battle to go to Millwall (again).
Not that seats are needed. You find Leedsâ following on their feet, always. Clubs, councils and local authorities can moan about persistent standing in stadiums as much as they like but theyâre wasting their time. Authority is a funny thing in Leeds, in the sense that itâs not welcome. They hate the EFL. They hate the Premier League. They hate VAR, they hate Sky TV, they hate referees and itâs all â categorically, undeniably â indicative of institutional anti-Leeds bias. What do they like? Yellow away kits, for one thing (even though their best seller was the charcoal-and-pink effort pictured below). And trolling Tyrone Mings.
(Alex Dodd â CameraSport via Getty Images)
Thereâs a marvellous talent around here for holding grudges. Take Michel Kitabdjian, for transgressions in 1975. Or failing that, Ray Tinkler for transgressions in 1971. Or Alan Smith. Or any of the owners, coaches or players who contributed to their post-2001 demise. It might sound petty but the closer you get to Leeds, the more you appreciate the way in which their supporters have been asked to stomach incompetence, ineptitude and promises written on cheques which had zero chance of being cashed. Leeds are an example of only being as good as whoeverâs letting you down next.
Theyâve also long been an enticing proposition. They are a great club, a famous club who didnât so much fall on hard times as get skewered by them. For potential investors, the thought of what Leeds could be if the pieces fell into place has been seductive. Naturally, that also ran the risk of attracting chancers. For players and coaches coming through the door, the thought of pleasing a starved fanbase fanned their egos but the pressure caused by a 21st-century timeline of emotional trauma was usually too heavy to bear. You donât get a free pass at Elland Road and Leeds people donât suffer fools, but the way in which Marcelo Bielsa will be feted forever and a day here tells anyone that tangible achievements which touch the soul turn you into royalty.
The boys from the Don Revie era are deities too. Iâll tell you this for nothing: Eddie Gray needs a statue, if not two. The club would have named their training ground after Bielsa had the Argentinian not blanked the offer from them to do so. His squad had the passion Leeds die for: innovative and brave in their style of play, capable of Premier League promotion after 16 hard years in the EFL, dedicated and ambitious in raising their individual ceilings. Pablo Hernandez had his best displays in his twilight years. Iâm taking that goal at Swansea City with me. Bielsa made giants out of men, a confirmed alchemist. There have been better Leeds teams over the years, no doubt, but I wonder if any generated so much romance.
Bielsa took Leeds back to the Premier League at last in 2020 as EFL champions (Michael Regan/Getty Images)
Most of the Bielsa era broke an established truth about Leeds: that they are condemned to live on the brink of crisis. The supporters seem to view their club in two ways. Firstly, to envisage their vast potential being realised. But secondly, to assume that something, or someone, will inevitably appear to stop that happening.
If unwanted records are there to be broken â the most play-off final defeats in history, for instance â Leeds will break them. They might look from the outside like a fanbase resistant to all criticism of their club but get on the inside and there cannot be a crowd who are more self-deprecating or better at gallows humour. Unveil a terrible club crest and theyâll consign it to the shredder in a matter of hours. Bluff, and theyâll call it. Tell them Red Bull wonât ever be buying their club and theyâll hold you to that promise, ruthlessly.
Transfer-wise, no amount of news is too much for them on Twitter. In addition, Leedsâ army on there will regularly ask you to get amorous with them (have I mentioned Iâm 43 but look 60?). Or to post pictures of your wife. Or roundly tell you to go forth and multiply. Itâs all good fun and joking aside, the crowd have been very good to me over the years â a Buckfast-toting, Trainspotting-GIF-posting Scot who had no affiliation with Leeds whatsoever before I first wrote about them. File this in the category of life experiences I didnât foresee.
go-deeper
GO DEEPER
Hay, Ornstein, Pearce on having large Twitter followings
Iâd be tempted to call them my second club if I didnât know that Leeds arenât remotely interested in being anyoneâs second club â less still being popular with neutrals. The image that sticks in my head is of the cityâs long-since deceased International Pool swimming centre, a building which had âWelcome to Leedsâ daubed on one end of it. Years later, someone used spray paint to add âNow F**k Off. Thank Youâ (without the asterisks), which is basically it, in a nutshell.
The club will be different if and when Elland Road gets its upgrade; thatâs not to say better or worse, but definitely different. No ground, so raw and battle-scarred, has ever suited a team more.
One final thing Iâve learned: Iâve never been much of a lucky charm for Leeds.
My first competitive game writing about them, in 2006, was a Championship play-off final defeat. My last competitive game writing about them, 17 days ago, was a Championship play-off final defeat. When I left the Yorkshire Evening Post for The Athletic in 2019, I promised that promotion would inevitably follow, which it did. So me standing aside means the title next season. Take that to the bank.
On my way out of the YEP, as itâs known, I wrote something which has followed me around since: âAn astonishing number of people despise Leeds United, or what Leeds United stand for. But this club was never made for them.â
I think that holds true, even if the reasons are slightly intangible. Those who follow Leeds would probably sum it up like this: if you know, you know. And if you donât get it, you donât matter.
Stick to that mantra. And keep living the dream.
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Looks like Archie Gray is off to Spurs for big money. Pity to see him go but hard to hold onto that type of talent in the Championship for another year.
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ÂŁ40m for an 18 year old
Fcuk.
Wrong decision.
Mental money though.
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Hard to turn down that kind of money
If they want to get promoted and not suffer a points deduction then itâs the right move. Itâs a business now, not a club that makes emotional decisions.
Looks like a final fee of between 25-30m for Gray with Joe Rodon permanently signing a 4 year contract heading the other way. Himself and Ampadu were a solid partnership last season so thatâs a positive move at least. It also means theyâre not under as much pressure to cash in on Summerville or Gnonto for the sake of it now
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We go again @flattythehurdler @mick_jones @Bisto
Captain Ampadu back to midfield. Bogle in at right back. Joseph given his chance as starting striker. Aaronson and Rothwell on the bench. Strong enough squad at least. And looks like Gnonto isnât heading anywhere which is a big win
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Lively start, shouldâve score there
Didnât take long
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Ah ffs sake
Hello darkness my old friendâŚ
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Ran past the Leeds youth lads there and their mentors who are staying in dangan for the salthill Devon comp.
Iâll wander up and see can I rob a mentors hoodie later.
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