the question isnt whether doing hookers is bad its how soon into the haggling do you introduce the phrase sheisafest on your hooties
[quote=“Thrawneen”]I get a perverse pleasure from engaging them in conversation, I have to say.
I’m a true gent at heart, I guess.[/QUOTE]
The last noble john eh?
true- she may guess that if my mates do it then in the past i might have done it but the past is the past
WB is like the second coming of Mary Whitehouse.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/01129/portal-graphics-20_1129914a.jpg
[quote=“Thrawneen”]WB is like the second coming of Mary Whitehouse.
That’s one very scary woman
Numerous stories from friends* who I consider global sex tourists:
First visit was to the fleshpots of Pattaya in Thailand. Stayed in a place called the Penthouse where each room had Jacuzzis, sex swings, go go poles, flashing lights and a special TV. The channel 99 on the special TV was a closed circuit feed of the go go dancers downstairs. All the girls had numbers so you ring reception and ask them to send up no. 33 or 52 and 21 etc. You get the picture. Cue numerous birds ordered up with swapsys, upside downys and roars of ‘Rape the bitch Pepperpot’ while slapping each others arses. One of the lads was called Pepperpot due to his timid nature aka Mrs Pepperpot. One of the lads misplaced his wallet and wouldn’t let the brazzer leave until he found it. “Wallet inspector” became his name similar to how Snake lifts the wallets from the nerds in the Simpsons. “Here you go inspector, everything appears to be in order”
The next day the crew went bar hopping with some English lads and ended up in some blow job bar called the Pump Station. The Pump Station involved a bar with curtains underneath the bar counter where you sat at and ordered your gargle. Within seconds, the curtain opened, your fly was unzipped and your todger was taken out and placed in said hoor’s gob. The hoors were very considerate of their place of employment and had plastic bags by their side to catch the muck. A ding dong Ireland England battle commenced where a Chelsea boy known as the Rapist blew first and declared “1-0!” The Irish boys got their shit together and quickly went 2-1 up. The English stormed back to lead 3-2 with one English and one Irish guy left. The girls gave it their all and the Irish boy uttered the immortal lines
“Some people are on the pitch, they think it’s all over - it is now!!!” as he promptly blew his barneys into the plastic bag of the local Lidl. 3-3 with a Manc sweating his brains out. The silly prick drilled a brazzer during the day and was calling on all reserves. The audience were treated to a loud Manc brogue urging her
“go on girl, that’s it girl, get your fooking lips round that” as he spunked his muck and declared
“That’s a good fooking blow job that”
Over then to Koh Samui where more fun and games took place. Some brass was left with bloody sheets and the boys got chased by a load of hoors on motorbikes after choosing not to pay their bill.
Thailand - what a location.
Australia and Rio to follow…….
Ah what a thread.
What a thread.
[quote=“Spidey”]Numerous stories from friends* who I consider global sex tourists:
First visit was to the fleshpots of Pattaya in Thailand. Stayed in a place called the Penthouse where each room had Jacuzzis, sex swings, go go poles, flashing lights and a special TV. The channel 99 on the special TV was a closed circuit feed of the go go dancers downstairs. All the girls had numbers so you ring reception and ask them to send up no. 33 or 52 and 21 etc. You get the picture. Cue numerous birds ordered up with swapsys, upside downys and roars of Rape the bitch Pepperpot while slapping each others arses. One of the lads was called Pepperpot due to his timid nature aka Mrs Pepperpot. One of the lads misplaced his wallet and wouldnt let the brazzer leave until he found it. Wallet inspector became his name similar to how Snake lifts the wallets from the nerds in the Simpsons. Here you go inspector, everything appears to be in order
The next day the crew went bar hopping with some English lads and ended up in some blow job bar called the Pump Station. The Pump Station involved a bar with curtains underneath the bar counter where you sat at and ordered your gargle. Within seconds, the curtain opened, your fly was unzipped and your todger was taken out and placed in said hoors gob. The hoors were very considerate of their place of employment and had plastic bags by their side to catch the muck. A ding dong Ireland England battle commenced where a Chelsea boy known as the Rapist blew first and declared 1-0! The Irish boys got their shit together and quickly went 2-1 up. The English stormed back to lead 3-2 with one English and one Irish guy left. The girls gave it their all and the Irish boy uttered the immortal lines
Some people are on the pitch, they think its all over - it is now!!! as he promptly blew his barneys into the plastic bag of the local Lidl. 3-3 with a Manc sweating his brains out. The silly prick drilled a brazzer during the day and was calling on all reserves. The audience were treated to a loud Manc brogue urging her
go on girl, thats it girl, get your fooking lips round that as he spunked his muck and declared
Thats a good fooking blow job that
Over then to Koh Samui where more fun and games took place. Some brass was left with bloody sheets and the boys got chased by a load of hoors on motorbikes after choosing not to pay their bill.
Thailand - what a location.
Australia and Rio to follow.[/QUOTE]
listen pal…i’ll have the crack with anyone but there’s a line in the sand…thats just sick shit…i mean what kind of irishman hangs around with a load of english cunts…
Jesus.
This was quite classy thread until Spidey came along.
[quote=“Spidey”]Numerous stories from friends* who I consider global sex tourists:
First visit was to the fleshpots of Pattaya in Thailand. Stayed in a place called the Penthouse where each room had Jacuzzis, sex swings, go go poles, flashing lights and a special TV. The channel 99 on the special TV was a closed circuit feed of the go go dancers downstairs. All the girls had numbers so you ring reception and ask them to send up no. 33 or 52 and 21 etc. You get the picture. Cue numerous birds ordered up with swapsys, upside downys and roars of Rape the bitch Pepperpot while slapping each others arses. One of the lads was called Pepperpot due to his timid nature aka Mrs Pepperpot. One of the lads misplaced his wallet and wouldnt let the brazzer leave until he found it. Wallet inspector became his name similar to how Snake lifts the wallets from the nerds in the Simpsons. Here you go inspector, everything appears to be in order
The next day the crew went bar hopping with some English lads and ended up in some blow job bar called the Pump Station. The Pump Station involved a bar with curtains underneath the bar counter where you sat at and ordered your gargle. Within seconds, the curtain opened, your fly was unzipped and your todger was taken out and placed in said hoors gob. The hoors were very considerate of their place of employment and had plastic bags by their side to catch the muck. A ding dong Ireland England battle commenced where a Chelsea boy known as the Rapist blew first and declared 1-0! The Irish boys got their shit together and quickly went 2-1 up. The English stormed back to lead 3-2 with one English and one Irish guy left. The girls gave it their all and the Irish boy uttered the immortal lines
Some people are on the pitch, they think its all over - it is now!!! as he promptly blew his barneys into the plastic bag of the local Lidl. 3-3 with a Manc sweating his brains out. The silly prick drilled a brazzer during the day and was calling on all reserves. The audience were treated to a loud Manc brogue urging her
go on girl, thats it girl, get your fooking lips round that as he spunked his muck and declared
Thats a good fooking blow job that
Over then to Koh Samui where more fun and games took place. Some brass was left with bloody sheets and the boys got chased by a load of hoors on motorbikes after choosing not to pay their bill.
Thailand - what a location.
Australia and Rio to follow.[/QUOTE]
Good man Spidey 
There’s life in TFK yet!!! Nothing like a bit of filth to get fella’s talking.
My own mates were in that blow job place also, They’d pop in for a pint and a pipe cleaning first thing in the morn just to get the day going and the blood pumping after a night on the thai whiskey!
Where was I? Ah yes…
Prague:
Over for a mate’s stag. Hit the usual spots - Darling Club, Club Amsterdam. One of the lads had a broken arm so as most sensible brazzers do they make you take a shower before you get it on. The brazzers are running around looking for a plastic bag and sellotape to tie around the lad’s arm while he has a shower. Fooking comical. He eventually gets washed and obviously has to make her go on top cos of the arm. Your one came out with marks all down her side from the lads cast rubbing off her side when bending it into her.
Cardiff:
After some Munster Heineken Cup win load of lads back in some knocking shop. Now one of the lads would be getting on and his back was in bits as he’s a barman on his feet working all day in a boozer in Rathmines and he was also standing the whole day at the match. He hobbles into the knocking shop and eventually gets the strength to dick some hoor. Off he goes and while he’s tipping away a load of muldoons from Clare arrive in. They’re juicing it up and having the craic and as bad back Billy emerges from the room hobbling down the stairs one of the muldoons sees him in bits, jumps up and roars
“By jaysus I’ll be having whoever he had!”
[quote=“Spidey”]Where was I? Ah yes…
Cardiff:
After some Munster Heineken Cup win load of lads back in some knocking shop. Now one of the lads would be getting on and his back was in bits as he’s a barman on his feet working all day in a boozer in Rathmines and he was also standing the whole day at the match. He hobbles into the knocking shop and eventually gets the strength to dick some hoor. Off he goes and while he’s tipping away a load of muldoons from Clare arrive in. They’re juicing it up and having the craic and as bad back Billy emerges from the room hobbling down the stairs one of the muldoons sees him in bits, jumps up and roars
“By jaysus I’ll be having whoever he had!”[/quote]
Ah Boy Pukey.
I’ll be reading this thread from the start. No doubt Pukey will be banging on bout the black one at some stage
Ha quality thread.
My own brothel stories arent much really. Went to Prague on a lads holiday a few years ago. Got a lapdance of the most stunning woman I have ever seen in Club Darling. Actually about four of us shared as we were broke students. She was Russian, bit sad how she was a hooker really.
The night before we went to this really seedy place. Taxi drivers brought us there. This was a real shit hole. Anyway lap dances were crazy expensive so the ten of us clobbered together some dough. I was given the task of picking out said comely maiden. I picked out the best there and she brought us all into a room. What happened next was some of the funniest shit I have ever witnessed. On came Toni Braxton unbreak my heart and next thing the sow starts to trot around the room. She took off her clothes to reveal a saggy belly and I started getting abuse from all sides. The abuse that bird took was shocking. We got fucked out straight away after.
The hostel owner we were staying with offered us these ‘new’ hookers when we arrived. 16 he said beautiful, only new on the game. Two of the boys took him up on the offer. They reckoned they were barely even 15. A bit wrong.
Thrawneen is a legend because…
- He broke a hooker’s heart
- He lasted an hour with a hooker
- He counts a Colombian hooker with fake bangers as a friend
- A hooker said he was the best shag of the year and this wasn’t on January 2nd.
[quote=“SHANNONSIDER**”]Thrawneen is a legend because…
-
He broke a hooker’s heart
-
He lasted an hour with a hooker
-
He counts a Colombian hooker with fake bangers as a friend
-
A hooker said he was the best shag of the year and this wasn’t on January 2nd.[/quote]
-
He is a Limerick man at heart
Not just at heart Runty. Physiologically aswell.
[quote=“KIB man”]Ha quality thread.
The hostel owner we were staying with offered us these ‘new’ hookers when we arrived. 16 he said beautiful, only new on the game.[/quote]
nice…better it be nice and tight like a mouse’s ear than big and open like a busted sofa…
[quote=“SHANNONSIDER**”]Thrawneen is a legend because…
- He broke a hooker’s heart
- He lasted an hour with a hooker
- He counts a Colombian hooker with fake bangers as a friend
- A hooker said he was the best shag of the year and this wasn’t on January 2nd.[/quote]
SS, I really think bringing one along to a family function easily tops all those.