I was in a place before where a guy used destroy the place with neon orange piss over the toilet seat and cubicle. I figured he must have been an alcoholic or had a medical condition. I couldnât understand why the person didnât just sit down given what he was doing to the place.
Shit is another level altogether though. If that was a regular occurrence the cleaning staff should just refuse to clean it.
Worth a new thread. Posters who are most likely to partake in a dirty protest.
Heâd smear it over his own keyboard and blame someone else.
Would the phantom shitter have worn toilet shoes
Do lads not realise when they are trying to power hose the urinal they are actually covering themselves in their own urine? Deary me.
Are you ok?
Iâm nervous about tomorrow, pal. Itâs the hope that kills you.
Stage fright is real
Iâm always aware of this, and try to slant it down the side.
Whatâs on tomorrow mate?
this is definitely a thread to be watched with return to the office coming along nicely.
i perish to think what the likes of @Funtime will do when they get back to communal bathrooms
I probably shouldnât, but I had this message from the brother there yesterday.
âSo, am sitting waiting for Ma today and father is in their room getting his cycling kit on. After some time he emerges in head to toe multi-coloured gortex holding a ceramic jug which he starts filling up at the sink. Ma says what are you doing and I was thinking he must be watering the plants. His response was and I quote âitâs this or the fire tongsâ. He was delighted with himself too!â
Iâd say the only Covid 19 rule Iâd like kept is the every second urinal is off limits one. Some fuckers would nearly shoulder you as youâre trying to power hose the bowl
I was at a dinner after a conference some years ago which was preceded by an open bar. It was a fine summerâs evening and after about 8 large bottles of South Tipp Chardonnay, I headed for the karzi to break the seal.
To my left was an individual who is now a government minister and notorious cunt. Either his mickey was broken, the prostate was goosed or he suffered from situational embarassment. Not a drop could he squeeze through his agonised grunts. Elvis let fly like a horse lifting his tail, which only seemed to make him more perturbed.
I was indeed tempted to throw a friendly shoulder at him or, worse, put both hands behind my head and whistle a local tune.
I did neither and have regretted it since given the cunt of a minister he has turned out to be,
Youâre like a two humped camel.
Itâs possibly the most bizarre humble brag anyone has ever made on TFK.
I have a colleague, as yet unidentified, but presumably a male (or a woman who thinks they are a man) whoâs pooing technique appears to involve shitting into their hands and then throwing the poo in the vague direction of the jacks.
There was a similar guy in one of my past workplaces when pulled up on it he gave the excuse that it was âtraditionâ in his country
We had a fella do this in school except that he rubbed it into the walls of the jacks. It was pretty disgusting. Himself and the brothers turned to the drugs after. I have a suspicion they were being abused at home.
