We need to “show them the money”.
“Lets have a ‘stand up’”
I thought Tommy Tiernan was going to walk into the room except it meant a five-minute meeting where everyone shared what they worked on yesterday and what they are working on today.
Christ above.
Heard that used before, but in the context of a subgroup of the meeting which needed to discuss something outside of the meeting environs, and return to the meeting and not disrupt what was going on, stepped outside for a “stand up”. I wept.
I have a weekly stand up meeting to discuss the status of a current project.
I worked on another project last year that called for a daily stand up call such was the intensity.
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A chap said he would “orientate me through the spreadsheet” on a phone call earlier. Does the use of orientate even make sense here, @glasagusban / @Fagan_ODowd?
Yes it does.
Expand on that please.
Allow him to orientate you through it.
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Is it the same as saying he’d “explain” the spreadsheet? Or is there a bit of a nuance to “orientation”?
Chaps, are any of you noticing gimps in work environments SPEAKING TO the document / slide etc these days?
“Right, let’s kick off. I guess I’ll start by speaking to the slide deck we’ve prepared…”
People no longer talk about or go through the document; they speak to it.
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What’s a slide deck?
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It does mate. It’s a synonym of the verb to orient. The appended “tate” doesn’t add any significance that I can discern so I would prefer the use of orient myself, but unfortunately it’s not incorrect usage which you can ridicule this chap for to your colleagues later on.
He should have said he’d take you through it. Using ‘orientate’ was trying to make himself looking intelligent when, in fact it did the very opposite.
I deal with less of this bullshitology since I move out of Dublin.
In 2014 I spent a few months a large Marketing Department of a international retail brand and the terminology used in meetings was fucking maddening.
I think this speaks to the inexorable evolution of business jargon. I too am getting increased visbility on this.
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Thanks, pal. I wasn’t sure if he was right or wrong; I just wondered if it was a bit self-indulgent on his part. He should have made allowances for his audience and realised I paid no attention to the spreadsheet because my mind was on orienteering and flags.
“Green dollar resources” - I took it to mean money actually in the account available to spend on a project rather than going cap in hand all the time to the committee for approval
The bint who used it wants to have a 7:30 am meeting tomorrow to tell all and sundry about how important the project and she is and this is the only time she has spare to do it.
Ain’t nobody got time for that. Looking forward to seeing her face at 9am.
I firmly believe that people who are not able to communicate their thought or concept in plain English, without using jargon, in sentences of 20 words or less, do not have a strong enough grip on what they’re trying to communicate themselves. I find a few innocent questions asking to them explain specifically what they mean by whatever bullshit term in relation to what they’re trying to talk about will fluster them. You then get to sit back and enjoy how uncomfortable they feel as they try to squirm their way out of whatever bollockoly they were trying to bamboozle you with. Firm upper hand established. (Edit: I hope no one word counts any of the above sentences)
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Fixed that for you.
I agree. As you say, they generally become completely flustered and it isn’t long before they can’t string a coherent sentence together. And the short pauses during their waffle when they’re trying to figure out what they’re bullshitting about are laced with use of “um”, “you know”, “eh”, “ah” etc.
It’s fantastic isn’t it?
As an outsider looking in @Bandage I’d say he thought you were a dozy cunt and he’d ladybird it for you.