Classic Simpsons Quotes


#221

Was just about to throw that up :D:D:D

Oh Kent, I’d be lying if I said my men weren’t committing crimes.


#222

“I wasn’t asleep, I was drunk!”
“I believe you dad.”


#223

“Professor, without knowing precisely what the danger is, would you say it’s time for our viewers to crack each other’s heads open and feast on the goo inside?”

“Yes I would, Kent”


#224

“No, No. Dig up, stupid!!”


#225

You’re an idiot.

That’s the best part of it for me.


#226

#227

On sky now

“Gosh, I thought he’d be happier in his true habitat.” – Marge Simpson
“Oh, I think he is.” – Wildlife Refuge Guy
“Then why is he attacking all those other elephants?” – Marge Simpson
“Well, animals are a lot like people, Mrs. Simpson. Some of them act badly because they’ve had a hard life or have been mistreated. But, like people, some of them are just jerks. Stop that, Mr. Simpson.” – Wildlife Refuge Guy

Happy 20th Anniversary to “Bart Gets an Elephant”. Original airdate 31 March 1994.


#228

Was just watching it;

Lisa: Dad, I think he’s an ivory dealer! His boots are ivory, his hat is ivory, and I’m pretty sure that check is ivory.
Homer: Lisa, a guy who’s got lots of ivory is less likely to hurt Stampy than a guy whose ivory supplies are low.

Homer: Look at this, Marge! $58 and all of it profit! I’m the smartest businessman in the world.
Marge: Stampy’s food bill today was $300.
Homer: Marge, please, don’t humiliate me in front of the money.

Homer: Maybe if we tied it down so it couldn’t move it wouldn’t get so hungry.
Lisa: You can’t do that, Dad, it’s cruel!
Homer: Oh, everything’s cruel according to you. Keeping him chained up in the backyard is cruel. Pulling on his tail is cruel. Yelling in his ears is cruel. Everything is cruel. So, excuse me if I’m cruel!


#229

you gotta love monty


#230

The argument in the wedding thread reminded me of this one.

I’m afraid I must insist. You see, my wife, she has been most vocal on the subject of the pretzel monies. "Where’s the money? “When are you going to get the money?” “Why aren’t you getting the money now?” And so on. So please, the money.


#231

And I say the greatest British Prime Minister was LORD PALMERSTON!!


#232

Marge being released from prison with her butch female mate.

‘You know what Marge, I have had a lot of bad luck with men but I think this one could be different’.

Signals over to Barney who is waving back.

‘He says his name is Homer and he works in the Nuclear Power Plant’.

:smiley:


#233

Barney, you saved my life! How can I ever repay you?

How about we get back together?

No way! How about a half an hour of pity sex?

Is there any other kind?


#234

The episode where the Skinner and the kids get trapped in the School due to a snow storm was on last night. There was a great line in it which i had never noticed before

[Bart and Lisa listen to the radio for school closing]
Radio Announcer: The following schools are closed today; Shelbyville, Ogdenville, Ogdenville Tech, and Springfield Elementary… [Bart and Lisa gasp in surprise]…My Dear Watson Detective School. [Bart groans] And lastly, Springfield Elementary School…[Bart and Lisa cheer] …is open! [Bart and Lisa groan] And it’s open season on savings at Springfield Menswear… which is closed.


#235

[QUOTE=“chewy louie, post: 980811, member: 1137”]The episode where the Skinner and the kids get trapped in the School due to a snow storm was on last night. There was a great line in it which i had never noticed before

[Bart and Lisa listen to the radio for school closing]
Radio Announcer: The following schools are closed today; Shelbyville, Ogdenville, Ogdenville Tech, and Springfield Elementary… [Bart and Lisa gasp in surprise]…My Dear Watson Detective School. [Bart groans] And lastly, Springfield Elementary School…[Bart and Lisa cheer] …is open! [Bart and Lisa groan] And it’s open season on savings at Springfield Menswear… which is closed.[/QUOTE]
“Mao! Diddy Mao! …what part of diddy mao don’t you understand?”


#236

Well let’s see, that’ll make three Christmases I saved, versus eight ruined… Two were kind of a draw…


#237

Krusty is dead meat.


#238

All the characters were dead meat 10+ years ago.


#239

Glug-glug, vroom-vroom, thump- thump


#240

:(:(:eek:

Ah no!

Just finish the whole thing.