Classic Simpsons Quotes


#381

#382

#383

“Acid eh? Gee that would’ve been stupid. Boy would my face have been red!!”


#384

The gun episode of the Simpsons.

Top class satire.

‘It could have been a real messy situation but luckily I managed to shoot him in the spine. I guess the next place he robs better have a ramp’


#385

#386

Wiggam has some great lines.

“Suspect is hatless, I repeat hatless”


#387

I’m directly under the earth’s sun… Now.


#388

#389

#390

#391

Eh - get down off the stage Ralphie sweetheart.


#392

Get them to drop the money under the big net in the park.
And then the net will fall down on them Chief?
Hey! I like it! I like it a lot!!


#393

I’d rather let a 1000 guilty men go free than chase after them.


#394

Ehh that really was more of a burgundy.


#395

Apu : Well if the police won’t help us I guess we’ll just have to take the law into our own hands.

Chief Wiggum : Yeah, yeah a lot of people are doing that these days.

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Homer: The alien has a sweet, heavenly voice… like Urkel! And he appears every Friday night… like Urkel!
Wiggum: Well, your story is very compelling, Mr. Jackass, I mean, uh, Simpson. So, I’ll just type it up on my invisible typewriter!
[Wiggum raises his arms and starts typing on air in sarcasm and starts humming]
Homer: You don’t have to humiliate me.
[Homer walks off, and another man walks in, wearing slightly burned clothes and playing compulsively with a lighter]
Man: I just torched a building downtown, and I’m afraid I’ll do it again!
Wiggum: Oh, yeah, right. I’ll just type it up on my invisible typewriter!
[goes through the same sarcastic routine]
Fruitcake!


#396

Smithers: I have to find someone to replace me while I’m gone who won’t outshine me. I’ll search the employee database under the word “incompetent”.
Computer: 714 matches found.
Smithers: 714 names? I’d better narrow the search. Let’s see… “lazy”, “clumsy”, “monstrously ugly”.
Computer: Searching… 714 matches found.
Smithers: Nuts to this! I’ll just go and get Homer Simpson.


#397

Marge: Well, did you call one of your friends?
Lisa: Friends? Hah! These are my only friends. Grown up nerds like Gore Vidal, and even he’s kissed more boys than I ever will.
Marge: Girls, Lisa. Boys kiss girls.


#398

Where’s the producer?!! I want to speak about this coffee!!


#399

This episode is just over on RTE. A classic

“My eyes, the goggles they do nothing!”


#400

Up and at them!!