Compulsive Liars are hilarious

Current Affairs
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[QUOTE=ā€œfarmerinthecity, post: 443031, member: 24ā€]Good thread this.

I know a compulsive liar. Amongst his tales are:

  • He was sacked by Gwenth Paltrow who had employed him as a child minder while he was in the US for a few month. He had inadvertently hit the child.
  • He got so many points in his leaving cert that he was offered to return the following year to his old school to teach honours maths.
  • Following completion of his degree, he was offered a scholarship to Havard, but instead decided to enter the accounting profession at 20k a year.
  • He designed many bars in Dublin, such as the Exchequer and the Baggot Inn, as well as the cocktail menus in both.[/QUOTE]

Hey @farmerinthecityā€¦

42

was yer mans fiance pregnant after all CLD?

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As far as I know, no she wasnā€™t. But he has disappeared off our radar as he left the company that my friend works for.

In another twist, he took the fianceā€™s surname when getting married. Which makes sense, given his horrific job record**.

[SIZE=2]**Assuming she actually exists[/SIZE]

44

[QUOTE=ā€œRocko, post: 443016, member: 1ā€]A lad we used to hang around with used to go a bit crazy with the lies.

Told us he was in college doing medicine in Prague or somewhere one year when we kept seeing him in the shops and stuff and heā€™d say he was just home for the day. Apparently heā€™s head of some insurance company in the UK now but I met him recently enough working as a bouncer in town. Told me the club were having trouble with scumbags and they knew he was a right tough bastard from years ago so they rang him up and paid him a fortune to work the door for a night. Fucking clown![/QUOTE]

sounds like @caoimhaoin

45

I knew a fella who once the hooch hit his lips he turned into Walter Mittyā€¦its was unbelievable the transformation ā€¦heā€™d tell you heā€™d a few months to live or that he was having an affair with his friends wife or that he just got into a row while you had gone to the toilet in the bar ā€¦next day heā€™d be totally normal and I genuinely think he didnā€™t remember anything he saidā€¦

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[QUOTE=ā€œmickee321, post: 975748, member: 367ā€]give us a few examples?
is it work related stuff, like what he did previosuly in his career or is he telling you he was out playing with the DLSP second XV at the weekends and dumped into Drico[/QUOTE]

There are a couple of work things, that are boring, that I know to be lies.
A few more things, like claiming he was at a wedding where a bride fell into a puddle and everyone laughed, that I canā€™t prove but are just clearly bullshit.
Said he fell down a hatch where pubs get in the kegs one day. Fell about ten feet to the floor and walked away completely uninjured.
Harmless enough shit, but Iā€™m pretty convinced he is a serial killer at this stage.

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[QUOTE=ā€œJulio Geordio, post: 975775, member: 332ā€]There are a couple of work things, that are boring, that I know to be lies.
A few more things, like claiming he was at a wedding where a bride fell into a puddle and everyone laughed, that I canā€™t prove but are just clearly bullshit.
Said he fell down a hatch where pubs get in the kegs one day. Fell about ten feet to the floor and walked away completely uninjured.
Harmless enough shit, but Iā€™m pretty convinced he is a serial killer at this stage.[/QUOTE]

from the stories you tell about this guy I think you are a bit jealous of him palā€¦youā€™ve no real proof that anything was a lieā€¦sounds to me like you and all the girls were slating him on the coffee break and the guy is a victim of office politicsā€¦disgustingā€¦

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Thinly veiled Iā€™m a pathological liar and soon to be serial killer post from Scumpot

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I know a guy who told everybody he went on an all-inclusive trip to Mauritius for his honeymoon when we all knew he spent the 2 weeks in a mobile home in Miltown Malbay

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You rotten cunt. :mad:

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Wrong username mate.

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:oops::smiley:

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Farmers got some of that wrong.
It was George Clooney I met in a bar, in Italy.
And it was Dynamo Kiev who were in the hotel I was staying in, in Portmarnock.
Everything else is spot on. *

*Does Palthrow even have kids? Thatā€™s a beauty

54

A lad I donā€™t know but would like to stab makes out he scored all the points for his club in an underage final even though he refuses to answer questions from people on the internet that might verify this outlandish claim.

55

It says a lot about you that someone you donā€™t know could irk you that much

56

Im going to fucking kill you

57

Donā€™t worry buddy, it was an u14 Roinn C final and they were beaten 7-11 to 0-3. He snigged the three points (one free) when the other crowd emptied their bench of the misfortunateā€™s who didnā€™t get a game all year.

58

Have you not seen the picture of him and his forehead getting the cup presented by Larry O Gorman? People in Wexford still talk about it as one of the greatest individual performances ever seen

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Larry Oā€™Gorman to me one night in the pub: ā€œYou were one of the best hurlers ever produced by Faythe Harriers.ā€

I must say it was a lovely and accurate comment by the 1996 Hurler of the Year and fellow Faythe Harrier.

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I prefer my story. That photo looked like it was photoshopped with MS paint anyway.