Guards - Cunts or Not

when you figure out how to drive and the state recognizes you are talented enough to drive a car unaccompanied then you will understand pal…until such time you can’t fully grasp the dynamics of @farmerinthecity 's situation…

Can’t help but side with the State Troopers here. Did @farmerinthecity want them to ignore blatant flouting of our road traffic laws? If It was some other driver in the bus lane you can bet he’d have been on here moaning about how the lazy cunts didn’t bother doing anything.

Plus he was a cheeky cunt.

[QUOTE=“farmerinthecity, post: 921420, member: 24”]Guards are very topical at the moment so I thought I would share a little anecdote of what happened to me this morning.

So I was driving to work this morning. Traffic was very heavy. I was turning left about 50 yards up to way so I decided to go into the bus lane which was on my left. I had just moved in when a cop jumped out of the passenger door of an unmarked car up the way. He flagged me down and asked me to pull in.
At this stage I am thinking of what I am going to say. I was going to go with a ‘ok fair cop but I was only turning left in a couple of seconds anyway’. As I put down the window on the driver’s side the cop says ‘You can utter as many curses as you want I am still going to do you’. The rest of the conversation went something like this:
Cop: What were you doing driving in the bus lane?
Me: I was only turning left there [pointing at the junction]
Cop: That’s what everyone says. Fact is that you are still in the bus lane. In fact I should be doing you for dangerous driving.
Me: How?
Cop: You are not aware where bus lanes are. What if a person was in that bus lane and you illegally drove into one and killed him?
Me: Ok mate (didn’t say this deliberately – force of habit).
Cop: Listen, less of the attitude. Also don’t call me ‘mate’. I’m not your mate. Call me guard.
Me: I am not calling you Guard. Why should I? You’re not better than me.
Cop: That attitude again! Walks towards the front of the car and checks the insurance, tax and NCT which were all in order. You have to drop your insurance policy into your local Guard station – which one do you nominate?
[Checking the tyres at this stage]
Me: Why do I have to drop in my insurance policy? You can see everything is order with my disc.
Cop: It’s called the Rules of the Road. You really shouldn’t be driving if you’re not familiar with them.
Me: What rule is it mate (again didn’t say this deliberately – force of habit)?
Cop: I said call me guard!! Ok step out of the vehicle sir.
Me: What?
Cop: STEP OUT OF THE VEHICLE SIR!
[I step out]
Cop: If you continue with this attitude, I am going to have to arrest you for public order offence.
[At this stage I decided to shut the fuck up (not that I was saying much in the first place anyway)]
Cop: Now. That has settled you down. Look you’re only a young lad, I can see from your driver’s licence (he was max 10 years older than me). I have no points on my licence, I always drive within the law. I am only trying to help you here, showing you some rules of the road and you start having an attitude with me.
[This is the most bizarre bit]
Cop: Now go to (the nominated guard station) when you get a chance and I’ll see what I’ll do with this (referencing the ticket).
[He walked off][/QUOTE]

You should have told him you have a pal who was in the RA and to watch his back.

“Mate” and “Bloke” are words used by jumped up boggers who have gone to the big smoke and forgotten their roots.

“Sport” on the other hand is an excellent form of address and a throwback to the the roaring 20s…

That’s different mate, we are Limerick.

[QUOTE=“farmerinthecity, post: 921448, member: 24”]He took all my details, reg, drivers licence and other stuff he was scribbling into the notebook. He also asked me to confirm that I lived at the address on the licence.

To me that was doing me there and then.

He didn’t say anything about receiving anything in the post, penalty points etc though.[/QUOTE]

Police harrassment. They are a shower of cunts.

I definitely remember a scouse cabbie saying ‘I’m not your kid…son’ in an irritated tone.

Although it wasn’t the same cabbie that threatened to put our windows in after accusing us of being tight Irish bastards!

[QUOTE=“Phil Leotardo, post: 921494, member: 197”]I definitely remember a scouse cabbie saying ‘I’m not your kid…son’ in an irritated tone.

Although it wasn’t the same cabbie that threatened to put our windows in after accusing us of being tight Irish bastards![/QUOTE]

Scouse cunts.

@farmerinthecity is clearly a shark a sheep would have called him gaurd. Well done Farmer .

That Guy: There are two kinds of people: sheep and sharks. Anyone who is a sheep is fired. Who is a sheep?
Dr. Zoidberg: Errr, excuse me… which is the one people like to hug?
That Guy: Gutsy question. You’re a shark. Sharks are winners, and they don’t look back because they have no necks. Necks are for sheep.

Superb mate.

:clap:

I am amazed at the amount of cunts who would bend over and address a jumped up cunt, most probably bullied in school cos he was such a loser and now exacting some sort of revenge, by a title as if he is in some way superior to them.

Was it for this the wild geese spread?

[QUOTE=“farmerinthecity, post: 921505, member: 24”]Superb mate.

:clap:

I am amazed at the amount of cunts who would bend over and address a jumped up cunt, most probably bullied in school cos he was such a loser and now exacting some sort of revenge, by a title as if he is in some way superior to them.

Was it for this the wild geese spread?[/QUOTE]

Passive aggressive is the way to go when dealing with cunts like that. Enough to infuriate them while completely playing ball.

But, @farmerinthecity, he is a guard so it’s fairly standard to address him as “guard”.

[QUOTE=“farmerinthecity, post: 921505, member: 24”]Superb mate.

:clap:

I am amazed at the amount of cunts who would bend over and address a jumped up cunt, most probably bullied in school cos he was such a loser and now exacting some sort of revenge, by a title as if he is in some way superior to them.

Was it for this the wild geese spread?[/QUOTE]

You did a great thing today.

[QUOTE=“farmerinthecity, post: 921505, member: 24”]Superb mate.

:clap:

I am amazed at the amount of cunts who would bend over and address a jumped up cunt, most probably bullied in school cos he was such a loser and now exacting some sort of revenge, by a title as if he is in some way superior to them.

Was it for this the wild geese spread?[/QUOTE]
No offence mate, but you seem nuts and are completely off the wall here.

[QUOTE=“farmerinthecity, post: 921505, member: 24”]Superb mate.

:clap:

I am amazed at the amount of cunts who would bend over and address a jumped up cunt, most probably bullied in school cos he was such a loser and now exacting some sort of revenge, by a title as if he is in some way superior to them.

Was it for this the wild geese spread?[/QUOTE]

Word of caution, I wouldn’t exactly advise you to heed any advice from RTT for how to deal with Gardai.

So should I address you as ‘accountant’?

This ‘guard’ thing serves to put people in their place - it’s like they are someone that must be obeyed without question. The fact that this cunt demanded to be called it shows he is just the jumped up power trip cunt that I already referred to.

He is exactly the type of guy we should be listening to.

is RTT a guard by any chance?

The pedals look the exact same as well.