Extremely good thread here. One of the things Iâve noticed here is that in the space of maybe 10/15 posts weâve seemlessly moved from suicide to obesity without anyone even noticing and really from there to the attitude of kids and their parents behaviour towards them.
Yet everything is connected. I find that the biggest issue facing my generation is the pace in which society has moved in the last 20 years or so. To a certain extent we all look back to our own teenage years mostly with fond memories and recalling how innocent it all was. In reality it probably was and we can say how our own parents did the same. However the last 20 has seen society advance probably two generations rather than one.Probably the main reason being technology.
This is where I struggle tbh. I find it hard to keep up with my kids. Social media has meant that a lot of issues /challenges and general âlife stuffâ now enter our parenting lives much earlier than a lot of us anticipated and I for one find that hard to deal with.
A small example. Recently my 11 year old was watching something on television and an interview came up with someone who was obviously homosexual. She turned around and said "Daddy, heâs so gay "
Now at 11 gay to me meant happy or Gay Byrne was the only person I knew of.
The second point being that she could recognise when someone was gay but didnât really know what it meant. When I asked her about this she confirmed my suspicions. And when asked about how she still knew he was gay she said that she had learned about it in school through her pals.
My point is that as a parent I was not expecting to deal with this for another three or four years. Why? Because I didnât have to deal with it until I hit my early/mid teens.
The same applies to any other of lifeâs challenges out there.
The issues are two fold.
I fundamentally believe that an awful lot of my generation are stuck between a rock and a hard place. We are confronted with issues we are not yet ready to face.
Secondly social media makes sure that we have to deal with these issues head on.
Gone are the days when your 10 year old came home from school , played outside for an hour , had dinner, fid a bit of homework and all communication outside the immediate family was parked until 9am the next morning. Nowadays you have the likes of snap chat , Facebook etc where conversations are carried out throughout the day. Therefore issues such as bullying, even obesity issues never get parked for awhile.
A lot of parents tend to believe that these issues need to be dealt with at school level as in a lot of households these days both parents are working and believe they donât have the time.
What they tend to forget is that like ourselves teachers are still learning about whatâs out there and to a certain extent are no more streetwise to ourselves.
We seem to forget sometimes that as parents we have to prioritise our children.
Prioritising doesnât mean succumbing to their every whim and just because Jimmy down the road gets the latest play station or phone doesnât mean my kid gets it as well.
We need to make sure our kids can feel secure in the family environment while at the same time be confident enough to deal with what is thrown at them. Sending a kid to a personal trainer because they are overweight is just wrong on so many levels. Itâs handing the issue to someone else and letting them deal with it and if it doesnât work we can blame someone else.
But in order to realise how wrong it is, I think we as parents need to take a long hard look at ourselves and take responsibility for it first and foremost. By all means use what support is out there but own the problem.
My little gag, I meant the beginning of the day, in my memory weâd leave the house at about 9 in the morning or whenever somebody knocked at the door and said âis backinatracksuit coming outâ and weâd return at about 10 that night, weâd have something to eat in somebodyâs house but youâd never know
What your saying is that a lot of kids donât have a sense of belonging/being part of something these days- Thatâs what social media largely is - a shared experience⌠Thatâs why sport, music, dance etc is very important for young people - it instills a sense of community that we are all losing - Globalization is great but not at the expense of self identity. Youâve more kids walking around today who can affiliate with African American culture than they can their own. I fully believe that we need an Irish cultural revolution - our music/language/dance needs to evolve to the modern world⌠Of course iâm not saying itâs as easy as that and that all our problems can be solved by playing the tin whistle (cc @ChocolateMice) but that shared experience and sense of identity can certainly give young people tools for the rest of their life - instead of some poor fuck thinking heâs straight out of compton cc @Turenne @glasagusban
Hungover
A belter of a post.
One point i forgot that stands out there is homework. Homework now is a disaster. Its way way too much and for some parents the only âquality timeâ they spend with kids is doing homework during the week. And now kids are being taught differently its causing awful confusion. Not to mention the fact they have forgotten most of the nonsense taught in schools anyway.
As one fella said to me way back âi think the teacher is deliberately piling on the homework to piss us off aince we complained about itâ.
Good chance this is correct in some cases
Doesnât every older generation believe the modern generation is fucked though?
Lads on here would probably have been worried about the evils of rock and roll in the 70s
Ya, that was my life. And more particularly my brother who farmer alot with licals. So much so that we left him hanging on in our septic tank for hours on end after falling in because nobody batted an eyelid that he was gone. Never know how he survived.
This too - Part and parcel of life - But I suppose previous generations were not exposed to so much harm/info as the current - No doubt the pendulum will swing back when the current generation become parents themselves- As Iron Mick said, thereâs been a massive jump forward that his slow bastard of a generation just canât get their heads around - thick cunts.
Yes but itâs not just that. Itâs a combination of a lot of things. Itâs also the dilemma from a parents perspective of having to deal with kids on a much more mature level at an earlier age.
Donât get me wrong there is an awful lot of good stuff happening such as sex education, drug education etc.
But there is still a vacuum that needs to be filled.
Let me put it this way. It is not unusual these days for a kid to be able to explain âthe birds and the beesâ to a parent without batting an eyelid. Yet maybe two weeks later you might be sitting down with that kid to write a letter to Santa.
The same brains on here that fixed the HSE have now come up with a solution to reduce suicide rates & childhood obesity
Youâre right though itâs true. Iâm guessing /hoping that if/ when my kids become parents that they will be better able to deal with it.
My generation needs to fill the vacuum thatâs there but to a large extent we donât have the tools to do that
To a certain extent. But every generation up to now had to go out into the world, find those âevilsâ and bring them back.
Now you donât even have to leave the house to experience it.
On the contrary,âŚNo one has put forward a solution, mate, just simply noted that these problems are rooted in many facets of modern life and solving them is not as simple as just talking about them or burying your head in the sand as @Fitzy is pushing for.
Stop trying to turn a progressive conversation into a point scoring tit for tat exercise just because youre annoyed that your family are coming home.
I donât think youâre quite getting the gist of the conversation you stupid boy.
Donât be such a smartarse.
Its quite condescending the tone of peoples posts mate.
Suicide rates are falling in Ireland which makes a lot of the theories being put out there as pure horseshit - leave it to the experts
Identify with?
Iâd say writing and forming your own rap group is more affiliation - but youâre right, thatâs just you, iâve probably over stated and the majority just identify with - But you all look the same to me.
Youâre very tightly wound these days. Whatâs that all about?
The conversation wasnât solely about suicide, brah - but some of the factors that lead to it and other problems in society. I think everyone here agrees that the experts are best left to deal with it and I donât think anyone is pushing for final solutions as such.