Toilet Etiquette at Work

[myboyblue]

@grapes

Seriously Locke it stinks of piss. God only knows what some of you silly sick deviants have written in it. Let me out!

@Handsofpiss?

[HBV]

@Fitzy

Just saw the most ridiculous thing in the jacks there. I was just finishing up a slash and one of our accountants walks in. He is a gentleman of Pakistani origin, in his 50’s. He is also a total hypochondriac. As I was washing my hands, there reflected in the mirror, is our hero, in a cubicle with the door open, trying to pull up the closed toilet seat with his foot (he did have shoes on, happy to report). He is apparently averse to germs, though doesn’t seem to mind transferring whatever shit is on his shoes to the jacks. I walked out having finished matters. I would assume he finally opened the toilet seat (he had failed in this mission by the time I left) and then stood, cubicle ajar, pissing into the centre of the bowl (as I have seen him do), as loudly as possible, which I find disgusting.
I’ve walked in there on more than one occasion and this lad has what appears to be the workings of a crystal meth factory laid out on the sink, as he apparently has multiple allergies and ailments. He’s fucking allergic to approving credit for my customers as well, the bollocks.

Thats as good as Viagra to @Fagan_ODowd

[mikehunt]

I blocked Trap 1 today. While it has been a burning ambition of mine for some time now I am disappointed I didn’t include in my yearly objectives. I would have scored myself a 5 on my self review (5 being the top score).

[Tassotti]

are you thick Irish bastards still using a 1-5 appraisal scale?

[mikehunt]

@Tassotti

are you thick Irish bastards still using a 1-5 appraisal scale?

Good point. I’ll let them know to complicate it like they do over in the mainland to sucker the Micks in to thinking it matters.

[PhattPike]

Was it a big fat steaming duke that did the deed, or did you over-compensate on tp? How many courics are we taking about here?

[mikehunt]

@PhattPike

Was it a big fat steaming duke that did the deed, or did you over-compensate on tp? How many courics are we taking about here?

It was a periscope poop.

[mikehunt]

On the way into the toilets I seen 2 ladies chatting outside. They were still there 20 minutes later as I walked out. They must have no work to be doing.

[KinvarasPassion]

They really are a disgusting shower of cunts

“Pond of human excrement” found at Donegal takeaway

[Tassotti]

you’d want your fucking head examined to ate takeaway food

[KinvarasPassion]

@Tassotti

you’d want your fucking head examined to ate takeaway food

Imagine some whiny Nordie cunt licking his lips of a Saturday evening as he tears into his onion bhaji… When less than 30 minutes earlier the same piece of food was getting splatters of Rajeshs oriental faeces as he deep squatted over the pond of excrement.

[Locke]

You saw, not you seen…

@mikehunt

On the way into the toilets I seen 2 ladies chatting outside. They were still there 20 minutes later as I walked out. They must have no work to be doing.

[TheUlteriorMotive]

I hope you were wearing your poo shoes so any deviant in cubicle next door had no idea you were in trap 2

[Tassotti]

sure those filthy bastards shit into a hole in the ground, I’d say anywhere would do them

[TreatyStones]

@Tassotti

sure those filthy bastards shit into a hole in the ground, I’d say anywhere would do them

And use their hand to wipe their arse.
Some have a specially cultivated finger nail for scrapping off bits of shit.

[flattythehurdler]

Are ye talking about Indians, donegal lads or nordies in general here chaps?

[Ambrose_McNulty]

The nordindians

[Chucks_Nwoko]

@Fitzy

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=1660498304022111&id=945056922232923

[Fitzy]

I think I’d do myself an injury far outweighing anynof the potential benefits there pal.

[Horsebox]

I just left a shit bomb explode in the jacks there. Everybody out!!!